Wednesday, May 4, 2011

What a Difference a Day Makes

What a difference a day makes! At least no one is throwing up today and Z seems to have avoided it....for now! David appears to be back to his old self, but my head still feels like it could explode. The throat is a little sore too, but I think that is a residual effect from yesterdays festivities. I slept a good portion of yesterday and was in bed fairly early last night so my body should be pretty rested, but I still feel tired. I will be heading into work today, but don't see any working out in today's plans. This will be my second day in a row. Maybe tomorrow I will feel more like it. Today? Well today....I might just puke again!

I am really kind of irritated with the whole situation. I just don't have time for all of this being sick stuff. Especially not right now. I need every minute of every day to get everything accomplished that I need to accomplish. Right now I feel like a slug on a rock. At the rate I am going....May is going to zoom by and I am going to have accomplished nothing! Grrrrr....I get gritchy just thinking about it!

This weekend is Mother's Day! Maybe because we lost Ruth Poteete this year, but it seems that I think about my mother constantly. Granted....she has never been too far from my mind since I lost her in 2002, but this year (especially since Christmas) she is a regular visitor to both my thoughts and dreams. Often I wake up from having a dream where she and I are having a discussion about something pertinent to my current circumstances.  And there are many times that something happens and I wish with all my heart that Mom was here for me to talk to.

While Mom loved all my kids, David was special to her. She was there everyday of his fight to survive in the NICU and she fought and argued with the neurologists when they insisted that they didn't think David had brain activity therefore we should take him off life support. I know Mom felt a great amount of satisfaction after they did the EEG and had to come in and tell us that fact David DID have brain activity! She didn't have to say "I told you so!"   Her look said it all!

When the cancer started to take hold of Mom, I know she fought extra hard because of David. It was her dream to one day be able to walk down the street with David holding on to her finger and walking by her side. She never once questioned how far David would go in this world, because in her heart of hearts......she truly believed that his life was limitless. She made the rest of us believe that too. So now when David does things like say "Mama,"  or turn on lights, or get his little cousin to copy him, or boogy.....I know how excited Mom must be and just wish she was here with us watching him grow and learn and most of all.....achieve. Gosh I miss my mom!

Well David is watching Spongebob and laughing and making his happy sounds. I would say he is feeling much better. (Wish Spongebob did that for me!) I guess the fact that David is better will make this a much better day for all of us.

They say that it is suppose to be a warm one today, but that once again the wind is suppose to be high and there are fire warnings posted. Wouldn't you know that the day I am is beautiful outside.....but now that I am up and about, the wind is going to be ferocious again? Bet that doesn't help my headache one bit. Oh least I am not puking.

So it is Wednesday and blessedly we are half way through the week. I will end today with this video. This song has always reminded me of my mom and how I have felt since losing her. Here is Tim McGraw and Can't Be Really Gone. Hope you have a wonderful Wednesday!

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