Saturday, July 28, 2012

Chick-fil-A: To Eat or Not To Eat? That is the Question

 
If you look up the term: to take a stand, you generally come up with the definition of taking a firm stance or holding ones ground on a subject. It falls directly in line with the way I was brought up. My mother taught me from a very young age to take a stand. She believed that  whether it was God, country, family, friends, attitudes or actions....it was important to take a stance and stick with it. She also taught me that taking a stand on certain things might make me less than popular because popularity is usually built on anything but a firm stance. Popularity is usually built from a wishy washiness of trying to please everyone......which is simply impossible. You can't be firmly planted on both sides of an issue. You will ultimately have to choose and someone will undoubtedly find your choice or stance wrong or offensive simply because it doesn't agree with how they think. I guess that comes from our modern societal narcissism that our own personal thoughts are always right and even in a free society if someone disagrees with us....they must somehow be punished for having an attitude or belief other than our own.

If you have turned on the tv, read a paper, or looked at any form of social media in the last week...then I am sure you have an inkling of where this all is going. Yes...Chick-fil-A (for those of you who live under a rock or in the vast middle of nowhere with no fast food eateries....I am speaking of a chicken restaurant) had the audacity to take a stand on a highly charged subject....and stick with it, causing a frenzy of boycotting and name calling. Why? Because their stance was offensive to some. What subject could cause such a social upheaval? Why same sex marriage of course!!!!

Now before I proceed further....let me preface this with a few things. First of all...I have never stepped into a Chick-fil-A. I have heard they are quite good and Wichita just got a Chick-fil-A a few months back. Apparently it has been a madhouse of culinary delight since it opened and even now you have to wait when going through the drive through as cars wrap around the building. To me this says that there is a pretty yummy product being created and served at this chicken place and customers are going wild to get it. Again though...I am going strictly on what I have heard although maybe someday I will have the pleasure of trying it myself. That being said here is the second part of my preface. I was brought up at a time where homosexuality was looked on as a societal tabu and to "practice" it made the world see that person as strange, an outcast, a criminal in some places and even mentally deficient in others. It was not until I grew up and realized that given a choice...no one would choose to be that different in a world where being attracted to or loving someone of your own sex was seen as so deviant. It made me realize that these people were not deviant, criminal or mentally deficient at all. This was simply the way God (not their parents, not their environment nor even society) made them. It was not a choice and how horrible must their lives have been to constantly have to hide or be ashamed of who they were when they had no control over the situation. It was after realizing all of this that my feelings about homosexuality changed. Who was I to say that two consenting adults didn't have the right to love who they wanted? I don't believe God made love so that it could be expressed and received by only the few.

Even with my new found progressive thinking (only 40+ years in the making), I will admit that I have still ridden the fence on gay marriage. Why? I don't know! Perhaps old ideals die hard. It wasn't however until I talked to several people my age, also brought up with the same ideals, morality and basic beliefs that I was who are currently dealing with children who are either gay or lesbians that I finally got it. These kids certainly did not ask to be born this way and certainly their parents never wished such a difficult (even in this day and age) life on them and yet here it was. Do the parents of these kids turn their backs on them because they were made to be attracted to their own sex? Are these kids somehow bad people because who they love is different than whom society says they should love? Of course they aren't and their parents want for them what all parents want for their kids. They want a happy and full filling life for them and this may include marriage, a family and all the trimmings. By wanting this for their kids, does this mean that along with the gay and lesbian children that the parents should be ostracized and labeled deviant for wanting love and happiness for them? I really don't think so. So all of this brought me to here: I can honestly say that I openly support two consenting adults right to marry! I don't care what color their skin is, what religion they are or what their sexual orientation is. Love is love and I don't believe God put limits on whom we could/should love. Man did that. So that is my stand and I am quite comfortable sticking with it and in a country of free thought and free speech, while I don't expect or demand that anyone like my stance or agree with it....I do expect that you respect my right to feel that way.

Now back to the original reason for this blog. Recently Chick-fil-A came out firmly standing behind the fact that they believe marriage should be between a man and a woman only! Why they came out with this or what prompted the public statement I am not sure and since the media and social networking has gotten a hold of it....I am sure that by now the reasons why are a moot point. The only thing that anyone seems focused on is the statement itself. Since being made public....Chick-fil-A has found itself in the middle of a war where one side is now gorging itself on Chick-fil-A delicacies in support of their stance while the opposing side is demanding we all boycott the product and never darken a Chick-fil-A door again! To that I say: "Hmmmmm!" Perhaps we should back the truck up a bit.

I am trying to wrap my head around all of this and I certainly don't have all the answers, so please feel free to chime in with your respectful thoughts and opinions. Currently same sex marriage is a work in progress. It has been a tough fought battle and would not be where it is today if not for the fact that we live in a country where ALL voices can be heard and because differing views and voices are allowed....then changes can be made. Never will any one subject, issue, etc have a unanimous acceptance. There will always be someone with an opposing view and distinct reasons for believing differently. In a democracy you can't shut someone up or bully them into believing as you do just because you don't like what they have to say. For change to happen there must be education....and for education to happen...all sides must be heard. If you quiet one voice, thought, belief or perspective....then how long before someone steps in and quiets yours? To boycott a company because they took a stand that disagreed with a certain sect is the same as trying to bully them into shutting up and where is the democracy in that?  Am I right? Am I wrong? Truly...what does that gain anyone? Does that not further divide the gap between the opposing sides of the same sex marriage issue? Again...I don't know why Chick-fil-A spoke out on the subject, but I will say that I respect anyone.....even a  company who takes a stand that they feel morally they must...especially in light of the fact that it could hurt them or their business. While I do not agree with them, I feel they as an American company have every right to free speech and this statement was covered under that. And lets face it....if more companies where completely honest with where they stood and what charities, groups, etc that they supported and were affiliated with....each of us would have a list a mile long of companies whose ethics, ideals and beliefs personally disagreed with our belief system, morals or general ideals. Do we boycott them all? Maybe or maybe not?! So here are my questions: Should a company take a stand on a political or socially "personal" subject such as same sex marriage? If a company does take such a stand.....as Americans are we being Constitutionally fair by boycotting American companies for invoking their right to free speech or is it that same right that gives us the ability to take our business elsewhere and thus at least mentally silence those who do not agree with us?

Personally.....my lack of dining at Chick-fil-A has nothing to do with a boycott and everything to do with location and availability. Given the chance I just might have to try them out and see what all the hype is about. And if the day does come that I do eat there....it will not mean that I no longer support gay marriage. It will simply mean that I was really hungry!

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

I do not support gay marriage. I do agree with you though on people taking a stand. It is hard though when you morally believe something and someone openly states they believe the opposite, especially when it is a business where you have to give money for goods. I would much prefer to take my money to someone whom is more inclined to think and feel as I do. That is probably wrong but it is also the way us humans seemed to be wired. Interesting blog.

JJ said...

You said, "For change to happen there must be education....and for education to happen...all sides must be heard. If you quiet one voice, thought, belief or perspective....then how long before someone steps in and quiets yours?" I have to say AMAZING! Whether you agree with a person agrees with another word said in this blog, everyone has to agree with that statement. I was totally blown away. GREAT blog!

Anonymous said...

I have a daughter who has recently come out. I had suspected for years that she might be but as you said no parent wants that for their child. It was very hard for her before she came out as she couldn't be true to herself. Now since coming out it is still hard but in a different way. Now she can find out who she really is. I want for my daughter now what I have always wanted for her. I want love, happiness and someone who treats her like a queen. It does sound like you get it. As for chickfila, I think I will stick with eating beef.

Anonymous said...

You make an interesting point about boycotting American businesses. In today's economy we really ought to be helping each other out instead of trying to destroy each other. I agree that it is hard to support businesses that go against our personal beliefs but as you said if we looked at each business we associated with closely enough we could probably find fault with them all. I question though why Chick fil a did this? Was it to start controversy or draw attention to their business? If their motives were really pure then as you said we need to respect their right to believe and speak out even if we don't agree with them. Nice blog and great questions.

Queer Eye said...

Understand where your coming from but don't agree. Same sex marriage is important and should be fought for. Those against it are the enemy and so must not be supported. Luckily I am vegan so boycotting a chicken place is not an issue for me. Glad you finally came around to realizing that being gay is not a lifestyle choice but a fact of life for many of us. Hiding, lying and having to pretend we aren't who we are is degrading and wrong. And when people find out just who we are the ridicule and harassment can be brutal both mentally and physically. Everyday we have to fight for what hetero's take for granted. I will boycott any business, person, place or thing who openly denies me the rights that they get without a second thought. Thanks for letting me express.

Anonymous said...

Chick-Fil-A to eat or not to eat. I vote NOT!

Econ 101 said...

To protest and counter protest is as much a part of America as freedom of speech. In fact the two go hand in hand in my opinion. Those that agree with a certain opinion such as the declaration that Chick fil a made will support and I am sure some will even go above and beyond support to ward off any decline in cash flow from non supportive boycotters. Those who do not support will of course boycott and try to turn as much business away as possible. It all goes along with economics, free enterprise and democracy with our ability to choose which side we want to be on and how we will move forward once a side is chosen. As long as we are a free society the peaks and valleys of supply and demand and support and non support will be in place. Make me happy and my wallet is yours. Piss me off and I will take my farthings elsewhere. Econ 101

Anonymous said...

This is just another act by our adminstration to divide. Jeremiah Wright and Louis Farakan are both against gay marriage. And where is the condimation from the WH? There is none of course. This is just another attack from the WH to further divided our country. This tyrant of a president will throw anyone under the bus if their is political gain for him, including the gay community.
If you feel boycotting a restaurant if help further your cause. Then so be it. Chick-fil-A has always been strong about their beliefs. They have always been closed on Sundays since they opened so employees could worship. They've always supported that marriage should be between a man and women since they first opened. I knew this when I first ate at one back Towne West back in the 80s.
The controversy was created by the WH this past week. Wake up people. Obama has always believed that no crisis should be wasted. And he's created his conflict and crisis as needed. Wake up. This is a diversion from the real problem. And that is his record as a president. He has nothing to run on. How's the economy? How's the strength of our economy? How many people are employed? How are businesses doing? And how divided are we as a nation? Instead facing real issues, we are debating a family owned restaurant.
We are a nation of lemmings running towards a cliff. Enjoy your sandwich..

Steve

Anonymous said...

Reading your blogs you talk of being spiritual and or religious but you must not be very biblical. Homosexuality is condemned in the bible and I would think this would include same sex marriage. You either take the bible literally or you don't. You obviously don't. I support Chick fil a in their stand and their sales have sky rocketed since their declaration. I disagree with you totally. Homosexuality is a choice. We all have tendancies in our lives which are wrong but when we act on them is where the sin comes in. Someone may have a tendancy or desire to steal but the sin is in the act not the tendancy. Homosexuality is no different. This whole thing is not about free speech. It is about right and wrong and Chick fil a was right. End of discussion.

Anonymous said...

Cmom, I am with you on all of this. You and I have similar or maybe even identical backgrounds and upbringings. What was chiseled in stone 20 years ago has become a real grey area today. The older you get the more you realize that everyone of us has found ourselves with a gay friend or relative somewhere along the line. What really made me think about homosexuality was watching some of the kids my kids went to school with. A couple of them were gay and like you said, they struggled. Their true selves slipped out from time to time whether is was ward robe, voice or just the way they moved. They were taunted and teased and made to feel as if something beyond their control somehow made them a freak. It was then I realized that these kids didn't willingly become this, they were in fact created this way and at their young ages they were driving themselves crazy trying to fit in and not fully understanding why they didn't. I find you very brave to speak out on this subject especially with how you, I and most of our generation was taught. I also love the fact that you support free speech and take every opportunity to speak out on it. You may get a lot of flack for your stand on gay marriage but the reality is that the only people you have to answer to are the woman who stares back at you in the mirror and God Himself, both whom I am sure approve of this message. Great blog!!!!!!!!

Amazed and Confused said...

Did anonymous above really compare being gay to stealing? WTH is that? Loving someone is nothing like stealing. Stealing is wrong loving someone is not. I can't even believe that someone in this day and age would openly say something so ridiculous. Homosexuality is not a tenancy, a lifestyle or a choice anymore than heterosexuality, being black or being born with one arm is. It simply is what it is. Christianity is a tenancy, a lifestyle and a choice but loving who you love is not.

Chase said...

I saw this magnet on a car in the Chick-fil-a drive-thru this morning: http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/41Qq4z6TQPL._SL500_AA300_.jpg

Anonymous said...

You better hope that Fred Phelps and his followers don't read this or they will hunt you down and picket you personally!

Speechless said...

I am shocked. I didn't know that you supported gay marriage. I thought your conservative views were a little stronger than that. Does this mean you are no longer conservative? Does your heart now bleed for those who want hand outs instead of a job? Do you want guns taken out of the hands of American citizens? Do you know want government controlling your every thought, word and action? So what is your current thoughts on abortion, immigration and the death penalty? Have they too gone the way of your inner bleeding heart liberal or perhaps you are opting for a career in politics. If so, you are aligning yourself with please everyone politicians very nicely. I have to say todays blog left me speechless!

Anonymous said...

It just goes to show that they love you until you have an opinion different than theirs. Your popularity stock is dropping as I am sure you knew it would. You are braver than I as I keep my political and personal beliefs to myself. Not crazy about backlash or confrontation. You however seem to have no fear and jump in feet first. I envy that. I love the content of this piece and hope you never give up trying to educate and entertain the masses. Thanks for another excellent read!

J'nelle said...

Hey girlie...you still got it! Way to raise the fur and fan the flames. Your true readers and fans aren't going anywhere. Blog on Oh Opinionated One!

Wendy S. said...

Awesome job, Lisa - I completely agree. I support gay marriage and also feel like Chick-Fil-A completely is in their own right to express their thoughts on the subject. We live in a free country, right? Then people need to act that way. I have a friend who posted a supportive picture on her facebook re: Chick-Fil-A's stance and some of her 'friends' tore her apart for it, stating she was intolerant. Really? Who is intolerant? Those who state their views openly and honestly or those who condemn those who do? Hmmmmm.

Mike Elam said...

Lisa, I could not disagree more. I just hope u understand u are in direct opposition to God himself on this issue. If u would like I can give u scripture after scripture reference from God's word. He is very clear. We must b careful not to go against God based on our feelings. In the beginning God created them male and female. His design and blueprint has not changed.

podunk said...

Meh, Chick-fil-A is a fine chicken sandwich, fried in peanut oil, although I'm not crazy about the non-crisp breading. Love the waffle fries, but not enough to drive across town and sit in a drive through for days to get some. Really boycotting a sandwich over some perceived political stance is no way to go through life. Most business owners probably hold some belief that someone else might find repugnant, but who has the time and energy to keep a list? The owner of Chick-fil-A put his belief out there, if you oppose his beliefs...don't eat at his restaurant.
By the same token, beating some obscure verse in Leviticus to death while ignoring the hundreds of other Jewish-established laws that aren't followed by staunch and upstanding Christians everywhere seems somehow ignoble. Anyone out there eating pork and shellfish, cutting their hair at the temples, going into the church on their period, wearing cotton-poly blend fabrics? How about that whole "free of sin cast the first stone" and whatnot?
P.S.: Adam and Eve had three sons...no daughters (at least according to the Genesis biblical story...just saying...)

Mike Elam said...

Podunk what brilliance....just sayin'....

Genesis 5:4 ESV

The days of Adam after he fathered Seth were 800 years; and he had other sons and daughters.