Well....I have for the most part stayed away from facebook for the last five weeks. However, I do check in for my messages and the other day as I was checking in....a post caught my eye. I will admit that I felt the need to read on further. The post said: ACT LIKE A LADY! It caught my eye because I can't tell you the number of times growing up that my mother said those exact words to me. It was ingrained in me from the moment I had any understanding of anything....and it stays with me to this day.
The post that it came from was from a Mary Kay fb friend of mine who had been at MK Career Conference (at least I think that is what it was.) According to the post...at the conference this is what the speaker spoke about. As a former MK lady myself....I know that in essence this is what MK is all about...and honestly you would have to search far and wide to find a greater or more gracious lady than the late MK founder.....Mary Kay Ash. She was the epitome of the southern lady, but her lady likeness was not to be confused with weakness for a true lady is strong beyond measure.
At any rate....after reading the post, I couldn't help but think what a underused statement "Act like a lady," seems to be in our current society. We live in a world where girls wear the shortest skirts with no underwear and have no shame when their dress hikes up. Young girls have mouths that could make a sailor blush and the only thing left to the imagination with their wardrobe choices is what their internal organs look like. I don't shock all that easy.....but I can say that their have been times waiting to pick my kids up from the middle and high schools that I have been totally shocked at what some girls seem to think is school attire. I can't help but wonder if their parents actually saw them walk out the door that morning or if they are simply preparing their girls for a career on a street corner. Where have all the ladies gone? What's more....when did my generation decide that we didn't need to teach our girls how to dress or conduct themselves like ladies?
Don't get me wrong...I am not suggesting we start dressing our girls in burkas, but I am suggesting that perhaps we dress them age appropriately. No middle school girl needs to wear her clothes so tight that we can see her kidneys nor do they need to wear so much makeup that they actually start to melt when sunlight hits them. As for high school girls....while they have their own clothing issues...my biggest concern with them is their mouths. I have never heard such filth and disrespect for teachers, parents and other students come from the mouths of such otherwise attractive girls. Again.....when did we as parents suddenly find this acceptable behavior in our teens.....let alone our girls?
Sadly even if you go a few years older....the situation is not much different. It is nothing to go out to a bar (yes....I do occasionally get out to town) and see women in their twenties and thirties straddling men in a chair (this is not a strip bar mind you) or giving a guy a lap dance to the music. Again...most have everything they own hanging out and again...the way they talk and present themselves....well unladylike doesn't even begin to scratch the surface. And we won't even go into the way they dance on the dance floor. In my day that was called foreplay....NOT dancing! When and how did this happen? How did we go from a generation of girls who wore bike shorts under short dresses to prevent wardrobe malfunctions and who might cuss on occasion but rarely said the f-word to a generation who has no shame or modesty physically or verbally?
Granted....I am not speaking of all girls, but I am speaking of a majority. Did their mothers never tell them to "Act like a lady?" Whats more....did their mothers fail to show them just how a lady acts? One theory I have heard and I think might not be too far off the rails is Women's Lib. When women decided they were the same as men....men quit looking at them as ladies....because women quit acting like ladies. In some sort of need to prove themselves....women lost themselves. Women quit dressing sexy and started dressing slutty. Little did they realize that this didn't show attractiveness....it showed a sad lack of self-esteem. What's more....men are not all that complex. You put sexy next to slutty and a man 9 times out of 10 will pick sexy every time.
How do we expect our girls to understand the meaning of ladylike if they are not taught? So what is ladylike anyway? It starts with self-confidence and self-respect. It carries on to respect for others. It is not merely the ability to dress attractively without showing the world everything you have and some of what you don't, but it is also the ability to carry on a conversation with less than five f-bombs in it and to speak respectfully to and about others. A lady knows less is more and you don't have to give a guy a lap dance to get his attention.
Okay....so perhaps I was a bit soap boxish today. It is what it is. All I know is....I thank my mom, Mary Kay Ash and the other wonderful women in my life.....from the bottom of my heart for teaching me not just with words but also by example....to Act like a lady.