So here I sit on this last day of 2014 and I am reflecting. Of course I cannot reflect properly without being in my pajamas with my hair uncombed and a cup of really good pumpkin flavored coffee. Check! Check! AND check!
It is not lost on me that at this exact time last year, Z and I were sitting in the surgical waiting room at St. Louis Children's Hospital, praying that David would be undergoing his last hip surgery and that 2014 would be the year he walked. He has walked. He is doing well and hopefully, our prayers of that day will continue to be answered.
This last year has presented my family with a lot of hard times running the gamete from physical to emotional. We have upped our ER/hospital frequent flyer miles, I have had to use my "outside" voice on a few people in several situations and I have had to spend a great deal of time fighting against the machine. There have been tears, frustration and at times I have even wished for those little kid days where I could just pull the covers over my head and hibernate until.........
Yes, this has been a really tough year and in some ways it has remained that way right up until this very minute. I posted on facebook the other day that I was kicking 2014 to the curb and never speaking of it again, because on that day.....that was all I could think to do to move forward. Then someone posted, but what about the good memories?! It stopped me in my tracks. There were good memories!!!! In fact, there were some amazing memories. More over that, once again.....I was put in the position to see the extraordinary kindness of others. While 2014 had some rather sucktacular moments, it also was filled with the generosity of others. That is what I choose to focus on.
In 2014, I literally had to beg for help. It was at one of the lowest points in my life. Amazingly though, people who had their own struggles came out of the woodwork to help my family. Some who helped knew me and were in fact, close to me, while others only knew me from fb and still others didn't even know me at all. Because of them, my family was able to survive. Then there were those who gave of their time and skills. The summer was filled with individuals who worked all day and then spent their evenings in my backyard so that David could have a pool to do his therapy in. It was no small task and there were several weeks where these individuals had 14-16 hour days because they went from work straight to my house and stayed until late digging, building and giving David the pool and deck of his dreams. It was a success all the way around, as in no time after starting his pool therapy......David was kicking and strengthening his legs and yes....walking with his walker.
So.....it occurs to me as I sit here typing, that in retrospect, I have a great deal to be grateful for and that 2014 had many more bright spots than I originally gave it credit for. I think rather than dwell on the tears, I will just focus on the events and people that helped us, made me smile or flat out changed my/our lives for the better. To all of you who helped us, even in the smallest way......I thank you. For all the people who flooded our lives and made sure we didn't have to face the difficult times on our own.....thank you. To those that built us up, had a kind word or were just there to listen when all I had were tears and inaudible sobs......thank you. For those of you who laughed with me, sat around the fire with me and maybe even shared a drink with me......thank you. To all of you who prayed for us......thank you. To the doctors and nurses who fought for David, worked with David and helped to make sure that David had the best of medical care on each and every ER/hospital stay.....thank you. To the EMS who have earned their own frequent flyer miles coming to my home this past year and transporting......thank you. For those who labored in my yard, showed up at the drop of a hat to fix things and who helped me to save what little money I had......thank you. To all of you who helped us financially.....thank you. To my old friends who never left me, my new friends who this year has brought me and those that don't even know us but lended a hand anyway.......thank you. For my church family, my biological family and my hand picked family......thank you. To those who have bought cheesecakes and who continue to buy them knowing that is my income......thank you. For those who continue to be there for us and check up on us......thank you. You all know who you are and I hope you know that you have made 2014 a better place for my family and I because of your presence. Thank you!
I guess that 2014 held much more than just a few tears. After all.....I/we are still here and I am sitting in my pj's drinking pumpkin coffee and blogging about the positives. I would say that is a pretty good ending to any year.
Before I finish this final blog of 2014.........I would like to wish you all safety tonight and a wonderful.....peaceful......joyful, New Year! See you in 2015!