It has been awhile since my last blog post, but I thought today would be a great day to post. Those of you who follow my blogs, may remember that my son Z, went through a really rough couple of years. In the last six months his life has changed dramatically though and today was proof of just how much.
Today, Z tried out for American Idol. The experience was fun, exciting and all around amazing.....and that is just MY perspective. I can't even begin to imagine what it was like for Z and the literally hundreds who were there trying out and giving it their all.
Back, right about the time Z was starting his clean and sober journey, I learned that American Idol would be coming to Wichita for try outs. I passed the info onto Z, not being sure if this was something he was ready to attempt or not. Apparently though, he felt this was something he wanted to try and so he got on-line and filled out all of his paperwork to participate.
As the time got closer, Z worked on numerous songs but kept his upcoming participation low key. He didn't want to put any undo significance on it as he saw it as just a new experience that was a part of his "new" life. I respected that, though as his mom I really wanted to shout it to the roof tops.
Last week, his audition became a reality to me and I knew that I had to be there with him.....because....well.....I am MOM! With my life, putting everything into motion so that I actually could go, was not easy, but in the end, everything worked out just as it was supposed to and last night there was very little sleeping for any of us.
The paperwork which the contestants have to fill out prior to the audition is their back story, their aspirations, their consents for pictures to be taken and liability clauses to be signed so that AI is not held liable for accidents, etc. It also let them know that they would not be auditioning in front of the "actual" AI judges, but rather producers. The contestants are heavily vetted before they ever get in front of Katy Perry and the rest. They are also encouraged to "stand out" in front of the judges, whether it be their look, their song choices or their stories. Z was going in with the attitude that his story, next to his voice, was likely the thing that would make him stand out. As far as his look goes, he is happy with who he is and he didn't feel the need to stand out further. Many there obviously felt as he did and let their voices and their stories speak for them. Others though.........
Not knowing what we were getting into and being told in the fine print that camping out at the venue was not allowed, we were up and out the door by about 3:45 a.m. I was prepared for anything and had expectations of nothing. Z was surprisingly quiet, although in really good spirits. He had handed the whole situation to God and he was ready for whatever happened....good or bad. I was a
When we got there, there was our car and one other. Not knowing exactly where to go, we got out and began waiting by the far east doors of the expo hall. Soon, there were about four other contestants and their families waiting with us. No one had slept and one other group had been sitting in their car since 2 a.m.
Soon we began seeing people walk past us and down and around the building. One of the small group that we had formed decided to check it out. Low and behold, we were in the wrong place. Of course we were. I was strategically parked in the perfect space, just feet from where we thought we were supposed to be. Silly me.
We finally made our way to where the "real" entrance was and by this time, there was probably about 50 people in front of us. It was still a win as within the next half hour or so, there was about 300 people behind us.
I have no idea how early some of those in front of us arrived, but many had lawn chairs and coolers. For real???? I had my tiny purse and a bottle of water. I was traveling light so I had no idea what some of those in line were thinking.
The line was orderly, likely because everyone was exhausted. Out front was parked the great big American Idol bus which apparently carried all of the AI crew that attend each and everyone of these events. There was also about 30-40 private security people, a large number of "event staff" for the venue, about 30 AI crew members and then assorted police in and around the building. Of course, local media was out early, but I personally only saw our local ABC affiliate and no others.
As the line continued to grow, me, being the people watcher and apparent eaves dropper I am, watched and listened as people began to throw off their early morning lethargy and started to get pumped for what was to come. There were many local people and quite a few from further away in the state that had taken hotel rooms in the downtown area.The contestants and their families introduced themselves to each other and got abridged bio's on each other.
Soon, the media began setting up for recording and the liveliness of the crowd began to increase. The lights inside the expo hall were on and you could see security, AI crew and event staff inside putting last minute touches on everything, in preparation for the hoards of people who would be coming through hoping this would be their lucky day. The room was set up in a cattle shoot type situation where each contestant had to wind through a maze to get to where they would begin their journey.
By about 6:30 a.m., there was an excited electricity in the air. People could be heard playing instruments, warming up their voices and the quiet of the early morning, no longer existed. Groups of contestants were now starting to jam together and certain voices as well as looks were starting to stand out....even in this crowd.
Z took it all in with a quiet confidence that whatever was going to happen, was going to happen and he was good with that. Weeks before when I, as the always worried mom, asked him if he would be okay if he wasn't chosen, he had only smiled and said, "Of course. Moving ahead would be awesome, but I am there for the life experience." Today, I knew that was true. He was taking in everything around him and he was grateful that he was able to be there. Seven months prior, this would not have even been a possibility. Yes, you could see in his face just how grateful he truly was to be there in this moment.
About 6:45 a.m., an AI crew member with a megaphone told everyone to basically "crowd" to the front of the line, so as to move the line forward. Gone was our orderly single file as now we were a congested mess. He also told anyone with folding chairs or coolers that they had to take them to their cars. None of these were permitted. The line became even more chaotic with people trying to leave the line and rush to their cars to put their things away. Through it all though, people stayed calm, polite and very respectful to each other.
By this time, I could look back and even with the upsurge of people pushing forward, I could not see the end of the line. So this was what it was like to be part of the AI process. It was about this time, when we were informed that only kids under 18, could have a (only one) parent go in with them. Everyone else who was not "that" single parent had to remain outside. There was a bit of grumbling about this as many of us, myself included, had read that each contestant could have one person with them. I didn't grumble though, as I was there and happy that my son was having this experience.
At 7:00 a.m. the doors began to open. The contestants were allowed in one by one after they were fully checked out by security. They were also cautioned not to video or audio record any of their fellow contestants during tryouts or else they would automatically be disqualified. Tough words and even tougher consequences if you chose not to follow the rules.
Lucky for me, the entire building is nothing but windows, so I sat and watched as Z walked in. He was one of the first 30 or so to enter, and he walked through the maze to a place where they stopped and would not move again until 9 a.m. when the auditions would begin.
Throughout the morning, I had taken many pictures and videos of the process and shared it on Facebook. Many people I found, had no idea that AI was in town and most of the rest, never had and some never would experience such a thing, so I brought them all along for the ride. As tired as I should have been.....I wasn't.
Since Z was inside, I turned my attention to the others still in line. It was a fascinating parade of those who were stand out individuals and those who stood out by trying to look like someone else. There were some stunningly beautiful people there and those who let their two foot green Mohawk be their stand out feature. There were those there that had done this before and those who saw this audition as "just another audition" complete with resumes and head shots. There were a few that had both the look and the talent who I will not be surprised seeing in Hollywood. And then sadly, there were those that couldn't carry a tune in a bucket....and yet no one had ever told them.
It was an array of bold hair color and bolder hair styles and some of the most interesting clothes choices that I have ever seen. I saw throw backs to the Led Zeppelin 70's style with Robert Plant hair and tight pants. There were also throwbacks to the 80's and Boy George and to the grunge look of the early 2000's. There were those who had their identity and those still looking and it was all an amazing experience to watch.
When 9 a.m. rolled around, the line was back to about 300 strong and I could be found with my face pressed to the glass as my eyes surveyed every face until I found Z's. Believe it or not....I was about the only parent doing that. Okay...you can probably believe that. I am sure I was being THAT mom, and I am also sure that I had at least two of the security guards on high alert as neither took their eyes off me. If only they knew what I had been through as a parent.....
Finally, precisely at 9, the contestants were divided into groups at four judges tables. Once there, they were then divided into four contestants at a time. Each of the four came forward one at a time and sang for their 90 seconds. After the 4th was finished, then the judges would give them the good or the bad news whether they were moving forward or not.
Alas, Z did not move forward. I saw him walking out and I met him at the exit. His face was beaming and I had no idea whether he was going ahead or not. When he gave me the news, he was genuinely happy. He told me he had done his best and had been given positive feedback but it just wasn't his time. Once again, he was just grateful for the experience. He truly had a great time and he said he would do it again if ever given the chance. His attitude made it hard to even allow disappointment in because winning was not even why he had chosen to do it.
There were others from our hometown that also tried out today. I have yet to hear if anyone made it, but I have my fingers crossed. I do know there was a lot of real talent there today and I have no doubt that there will be several on their way to Hollywood before the day is out.
Today was an experience I will never forget for so many reasons. It was amazing to be a part of something so very cool, but more than that, for me.....it was the chance to see my son grow and thrive. I got to share in and experience a dream he has had since he was a little boy. Today, in this moment, I got to have real hope for his future and to have faith that he has more wonderful experiences ahead of him in this new journey in life that he is on.
