A Prayer, Perspective and a PSA

June! June! June! What can I say about June? A LOT actually!

I try hard to be a cup half full kinda gal, but there are those moments in time when no matter how full your cup is if it has a gaping hole in the bottom, it's gonna be empty pretty darn quick. Welcome to my big gaping hole of June.....or is it? 

June came in hot....literally, which made me cringe as I knew that the electric bill was going to eat my lunch this month and probably through September. Then, David's pool turned a lovely shade of putrid green which resulted in me spending much time at the pool store talking to the pool guy and spending $$$$$ I didn't have budgeted to spend. 

Yeah, money has been kind of critical this month as I had several bills come due as well as a couple of extra unexpected surprises. I then decided to stand up suddenly on a foot and leg that were asleep and I ended up damaging the top of my foot and ankle. Nothing broke, but for about two weeks, walking was absolutely no fun. It also happened that along with the money hemorrhage and the injury, each and every one of us in my house, ended up with some kind of unexpected drama this month and there isn't a one of us that likes drama, so yeah...there was all that. Then my central air conditioning decided to start going haywire, constantly kicking off in the hottest part of the day and causing my house to heat up into the '80s, only to have to go into overdrive to cool it all down at night. Now, do you think there is an HVAC person in the tri-state area that can fit us in before early fall? If you said no....then you would be right and even if they could do you think this girl could afford them right now? If you said no....then right again. However, regardless of the expense, air conditioning is something David can't live without, so again....  And then.....there was still the damn pool, again David's therapy, so really kind of an important need. 

So yesterday, I went to Mass and I prayed. I prayed the pitiful prayers of someone who is at the end of her rope and was ready to just let go. I whined about no money, all my bills, the drama in my house, and yes....even my green pool. I asked God for a lottery win and possibly a nice quiet island where I could relax, unwind and feel some peace (not really, but I am sure He could read between the lines). I am sure too, with all that is going on in the world, God said, "Really?" and then just sighed...or maybe even chuckled a bit. 

This brings me to the rest of yesterday. It was Father's Day and honestly, it wasn't a horrible day. My two older boys and I sat up outside, until late the night before, just talking and laughing, something we don't do nearly enough of. I then woke up, went to church, and the boys worked on the stupid pool for a while, Googling options and possible fixes. Because the water was a murky lake green, they decided to take my granddaughter to our local pool, and I stayed home to clean, do laundry, make supper, hang with David and babysit my grandson. It was a pretty typical day and by 5ish, I was only still feeling a little bit sorry for myself. 

When they got home from the pool, I started supper and the boys decided to work on the pool some more. I plan my menus and shop from my menus and I seldom buy extra as we live on a very tight budget. This little fun fact will come into play here in a bit. I was making Brinner (breakfast for dinner), complete with pancakes, eggs, biscuits, and sausage gravy. Just as it was almost done, my son came into the house to fill a bucket with water. I had no idea what he was using it for, as they are always running in and out to the kitchen sink. My other son and my granddaughter were out in the garage and I had my back to all of it as I was cooking at the stove. Then all of a sudden I heard my son who had filled the bucket and was heading out the back door drop the bucket and let out an audible sound. I turned around and the back door was open and the contents of the bucket were sliding across the floor, foaming, and smoldering, and then suddenly there was just explosion after explosion. I heard my granddaughter let out a blood-curdling scream and then the air was full of chlorine gas that started choking us. I couldn't see my other son or my granddaughter but I heard her crying. 

I yelled at my son who was still in the house to grab David who was in his room at the back of the house and to get him outside. I grabbed my three-year-old grandson and took him out the door. Then I saw my 15-year-old Corgi and my 14-year-old Boston Terrier starting to choke and gag and I grabbed them out of the house. At that moment I heard my other son in the backyard screaming CALL 911, while explosions could still be heard going off in the garage. 

The fear and anxiety in my sons voice terrified me as I had no idea if he or my granddaughter were hurt or not. I found myself in near panic. I dialed 911 and couldn't figure out why it would not ring through. I later found that I had actually "texted" 911 to my sons phone. Yeah, that is how out of it panicked I was. I finally tried again and got through. Bless the 911 operator who didn't hang up on my crazy self, as I was having trouble breathing which I am sure was a combo of sheer panic and a lung full of chlorine gas. I finally was able to explain the gas explosion (because in that bucket my son had, was pool chlorine powder and water) and they kept asking if anyone was hurt, and at that moment, I really didn't know. 

Just as the EMS, fire, and police came turning down my block, my granddaughter came running from the garage. She was crying hysterically, and I looked her over thoroughly. She looked to be fine but scared. Then I realized that I was hearing the water hose and I looked up to see tons of foamy water coming from the garage and down the driveway. My son was in the garage with all of those horrible fumes trying to get the chemical out of the garage. I then looked for my other dog who usually is connected to my granddaughter at all times, and of course, there he was, sitting right by her side. Everyone was all accounted for, but the question was, was everyone okay?

The next few minutes were a total blur. At some point, I ran back into my house to get David's wheelchair, and the fumes were just hanging in the stagnant air. There were guys in what I assume were hazmat suits, police officers, firemen, and EMS all over the place and they had blocked off the entrance to the street and then again about halfway down the street. Then I saw my sons girlfriend, and the mother of the kids, walking up as she had just gotten off work and no one had had time to let her know what was going on. The first thing she saw was the firemen with her daughter and she nearly had a panic attack of her own. 

Soon they had us across the street and they were taking our vitals and making sure we hadn't been affected by the chlorine fumes. I was so relieved to see my son in one piece after the garage clean up and both of my older sons had been stripped down and were wearing paper gowns as they had to be washed down as did their clothes. Everyone was checked out and we were all okay. On hearing this, I think this was the first time I actually took a full breath since I had seen that bucket contents go flying across my kitchen and into my garage. 

One of the first responders was talking to me as my ability to be fully coherent came back. He told me that we were so lucky that if it had to happen, that it happened like it did. The bucket opening was never facing my son, but it could just as easily have happened with the bucket on the ground and him standing over it. It could have ruined his lungs, splashed into his eyes and blinded him, or left chemical burns all over his face and body. The way it happened, not enough chemical got on anyone's body to leave an actual burn. He also told me that my other son also did the "dumbest/smartest" thing he could have done. He jumped in the middle of the gas explosion (dumb) and started spraying the contents out of the garage and into the driveway to start neutralizing the chlorine (smart). Had he not done this, that concentrated chlorine could have caused even more issues. 

After talking to the first responder, I sat alone for a few minutes and nearly broke down right there. Seeing both my sons and my granddaughter safe and unharmed was overwhelming, especially knowing that this outcome could have been much different and much deadlier. 

We have amazing neighbors, and one neighbor brought my poor naked son (although covered by a paper cover) some fresh clothes, another neighbor brought us out some water, and another neighbor took everyone to their house and fed them snacks and gave them a place to decompress. I had other neighbors come find me and hug me and tell me that it would be okay and that they were just glad we were okay. There was just so much happening and I was still having trouble getting it all straight in my mind. 

After going in and opening all my windows, and putting fans in the windows to air out the house, the firefighters had me go in and see if the house smelled too bad to stay in. Compared to the initial smell, I could barely smell it and since most of the smell was in the garage and only a little in the kitchen, I figured it would be okay, especially and miraculously, since we were getting ready to have a break in the hot steamy weather we had been having and the temperature was to drop into the high 60's with rain, which meant we could leave the windows open and give the chemicals more of a chance to dissipate. 

Once the all-clear was given, the first responders loaded up and left. By the way, let me give a huge shout-out to our local First Responders. They were there in record time and they were amazing with all of us and especially my traumatized granddaughter. After the responders left, most of my family sat at the neighbors, and I ventured into the garage to check out the damage. From the sounds of the explosions and the fact that much of the chemical went down Davids's wheelchair ramp, I fully expected to see it either full of holes or completely eaten away by the chlorine. I also expected to see much damage done in my garage as a whole. None of this was the case. There was still some chlorine residue left on the ramp and the table next to the door, and I had to throw out the bag of dog food in the dog food container, but other than that, nothing was damaged. Oh....and our chlorine "bomb" for lack of a better word, depleted us of pool chlorine as our last three bags were the chlorine gas culprit. Go figure. 

The entire Brinner, which I had been preparing with love, also had to be thrown out as well as our milk which I was using for gravy. Dang those pancakes and biscuits and gravy looked like they would have been good. Small loss though, in comparison to what could have been lost. 

After my walk-through, I just sat on the front porch and contemplated the last few hours. It would have been very easy to cry. In fact, I nearly did. The what could have beens, and worst case scenarios flooded my brain. There was also the thought of the money I had lost on food and dog food having no idea how I was going to make up for it all this month, also went through my head. Yeah, those tears were right there. Then I heard the wonderful sounds of my son's laughing next door. The emergency was over and they were relaxed enough to laugh. Then my granddaughter came running over to me with chocolate all over her face. This little girl, who had been beyond hysterical and traumatized just a couple of hours before said, "Grandma! This has been the best Father's Day ever!" I just looked at her not sure what was coming next. "Yeah, I got to go swimming at the city pool and then I got to sit in a firetruck and now I get to eat candy for dinner." And with that, she ran back to the neighbors. 

Suddenly I realized that God had answered my prayers, sad as they were, from earlier that morning. I realized looking at my family and knowing that they were all safe and healthy was all that mattered. Whatever had happened previously in this month, whether it was financially, physically, or emotionally didn't really matter. All that did matter was that we were all here and for all of us, the sun would rise again and we had another day to live. Gone was the drama, the stress over money and the trauma, and what was left was what I had really asked for all along......peace. I had peace because the events of the last hours had given me complete perspective. Thank you, God. You never ever fail me. 

As for the whole chemical explosion. Many on Facebook commented that they had also put chlorine powder in buckets before and mixed it with water, with no adverse reaction. Our situation scared more than a few. Luckily, a gentleman on one of my hometown FB pages did a little in-depth research and found what ultimately was likely the cause of our mishap. We originally thought that the chemical reaction occurred because I had been washing dishes while cooking supper and the water was on hot, and the hot water mixed with the chlorine had been the cause. Apparently, though, the water temperature had little to do with it. What actually probably caused it was that when you mix powdered chlorine and water, you are supposed to mix the chlorine into the water. If however, like what happened with us, you mix the water into the powder, that is what causes the chemical reaction. It sounded like we were shooting off guns in our garage. 

Now trust me, in hindsight, we all realize that mistakes were made with this situation and that we are very lucky that our outcome was what it was. Never will we EVER mix a chemical from the kitchen sink again, and before we do anything, there are going to be Google and YouTube searches first. Life just gets busy and sometimes we do things without enough knowledge or care and then critical accidents can happen. This was our reminder that we need to take more time and pay more attention and know exactly what we are dealing with. It also made us extremely aware, that anything from a critical accident to a fire, to a tornado, can happen, and we all need to be better prepared when reacting. Texting 911 in a fit of panic rather than actually dialing 911 was not especially helpful and could have caused the loss of crucial minutes if it had been a life or death situation. So at our house, we are going to figure out safety procedures that in the event of an emergency, we will all know how to act, but not panic, therefore making sure that everyone stays safe and calm. 

Okay, so there you have it. God once again answered my prayers, sent guardian angels to protect us, gave us some amazing miracles. and gave me some much-needed perspective on life in general. And bonus, we all learned a little (a lot) about pool chlorine and its dangers. So I guess you got a little bit of a PSA in the process. Your welcome! 

Until next time, stay safe, stay calm, and NEVER EVER add water to powdered chlorine in a bucket!

Imitation, Appreciation, Appropriation

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. Anyone else grow up hearing that? It is true. I don't know of anyone who is going to imitate a style, view, or belief if they don't appreciate it or find it to hold merit and be worthy of imitation. 

Now I am likely getting ready to step into a subject that some of you may feel I am not "woke" enough to have a viewpoint on and yet....here I am. And honestly, I have been living in this world a lot longer than many of you reading this and I have watched the imitation of style and culture for several decades. Until recently, the sharing of cultures, styles, and beliefs has been viewed as a good thing and a way to bring the world and its different people and cultures together, but now.....we live in a very different world. The following is my view and my respectful thoughts on this subject. As always, you don't have to agree, but maybe it will give you a different perspective, even if in the end, we have to agree to disagree. 

Recently, I have been hearing so much about Cultural Appropriation, and I honestly think it may be a reaction to the current state of the world we live in. When we are hurt or feel disrespected, we take our toys, or in this case....culture, and go home. I think we are seeing some of this currently and I find it sad at best and a loss of the best part of educating on and understanding different cultures at worst.  

According to Wiki, the definition of cultural appropriation is the adoption of an element or elements of one culture or identity by members of another culture or identity. So let's think about this for a minute. Since this country came into existence, all cultures have done this. We have always shared, learned from, and imitated each other's ways. When multiple cultures start intermingling, it happens and it is considered a good thing for cultural growth and mutual understanding. 

In a country as big as ours, there are always going to be many and varied cultures and each culture brings new and different things to the table whether it is ways of working or crafting, different types of foods, furnishings, clothing styles, and hairstyles. It is how a multi-cultural community, city, state, and country learn and grow from each other. 

So this cultural appropriation dialogue has just been the latest frustration in the ongoing race issues this country is dealing with. It has become one of the newest ways people seem to find racism, only, in this case, maybe it doesn't actually exist. 

Now, I am not saying that racism is not real and that it isn't a problem in our country and our world. In fact, over the last decade, racism has hit epic proportions and it is directed at every race from every race, but I really don't think that cultural appropriation has anything to do with racism. In fact, if you try to bring racism into it, you simply can't make a good case, because far from being racist, imitation actually shows respect for other cultures and a sharing of beliefs, styles, and views. In my humble opinion, to ignore or pigeonhole other cultures is what is truly racist. If you pretend that their style, cuisine, and culture don't exist or aren't worth sharing and yes, even imitating, then you are saying that as a people, they simply don't matter. Apparently, though, not everyone sees it like I do.  

What seems to be most under fire currently though is style. While I have been hearing so much about cultural appropriation in general, one celebrity of sorts who currently has her feet to the flames is singer, Gwen Stefani. Now don't get me wrong, I am not really a fan of hers, but I do think that people are being a bit ridiculous right now. Ms. Stefani's big sin in cultural appropriation comes from various hairstyles and styles in general that she wore for a while when performing. The style she wore is called Harajuku and, it is a collaboration of gothic, punk, and Japanese styles. The style started in Japan and suddenly there were Harajuku girls everywhere. As many styles do, it found its way to the internet, then runways and before long, the Harajuku style was being imitated all over the world. Stefani, who was all about young up-and-coming style, found Harajuku particularly appealing, and before we knew it, she had a song, a business brand, and a personal style that were very Harajuku.  

Like most styles and fads, time moved on, Stefani's style changed with the times and I personally hadn't thought about or even heard of Harajuku in a while. Suddenly though, Stefani is under fire for.....yep, you guessed it, cultural appropriation. It apparently is a big enough deal to some, to make it to national news outlets and end up in my social media newsfeed over and over again. Why? Why? Why is this such a newsmaker and why are people so upset over it? It makes no sense to me. 

After doing some reading on the subject, the appropriation concern is that because Stefani made her name synonymous with Harajuku, that she actually took it away from the culture that created it. Hmmm....first of all, the style itself is a mix of many styles, though it was a Japanese creation. This means that the Japanese appropriated the punk and gothic American styles to create something that they don't want an American to appropriate from them. Do you see the lack of real argument here? Add to that, Stefani's song Harajuku Girl, basically pays homage to the style itself and my question is.....where is the problem? Do they think that we might miss the fact that the style was literally, made in Japan? 

So let's take a deeper dive here. This country started with Indigenous people, but soon became a melting pot of races, colors, cultures, ethnicities, and religions. Each new group from white to black to Asian to Latino and every other group in between has brought with them specific ways of life, foods, faiths, beliefs, and styles. Once here, they began doing what people co-existing together do. They started mingling, sharing, and teaching their different cultures. They learned new cuisines, styles, and ways of life and some even intermarried, creating new cultures within old ones. By doing this though, it doesn't mean that anything is taken away from the original. It only means that it is shared and appreciated, not appropriated by new cultures. Quite honestly, it is part of what makes our world so great. 

If we are going to talk race here, then let's take it to the simplest terms. If you aren't willing to share your country, jobs, businesses, neighborhoods, schools, kindness, style, and culture with others regardless of race, color or ethnicity....then maybe you need to question your own culpability on the issue of racism. If on the other hand, you willingly share all those things and appreciate the fact that your culture is respected enough to be imitated, and through that imitation, there might be some much needed cultural education, then I think that you just might be doing it right, and there may still be hope for this world yet. 

So there you have it. I may not be "woke" but I am awake, and I think that through the sharing of our cultures, we can only improve the world and make it a better place. 

Until next time, may you find kindness, may you give kindness, and may you appreciate all the people, cultures, races, and styles that this world has to offer.