The Art of Perspective

Perspective. It is not a one size fits all view of the world. It is actually individualized by who we are and how our past reflects our present. In other words, a group of six different people from six different backgrounds can all go through the exact same incident or situation and come out of it with six different perspectives on the incident or situation. I think, as a whole, people lose sight of this and thus get frustrated or upset when others either don't have the same devil may care attitude over a situation or the same "the sky is falling" attitude. It is simply forgotten that people are individuals with individual views. 

A perfect example of this whole individual perspective thing was the last two years with COVID. We all were faced with the same virus and the same possibility of acquiring it, and yet the way people reacted to it was everything from "So what it is just another virus. I am going on with my life as normal," to the other end of the spectrum where people refused to leave their homes and if they did have to venture out, they didn't go without a weeks supply of hand sanitizer and a military-grade face mask. In between these two extremes were many variations of both scenarios. Same virus, the same possibility of contracting it, and yet a million different perspectives on the need for safety and protection. What is more, with those different perspectives also came an almost militant view on others and their lack of or overreaction to how they handled the situation. It has literally been crazy with people losing friendships and family not from the virus itself but from the set-in-stone perspectives they had over it. So yeah, perspective is kind of huge for us humans.  

I think at times, we all forget that we are all human beings with many things in common, the most important of which is the fact that we all come into this world and none of us gets out alive, but there is a lot of gray area as to how the time we have from beginning to end should be used. There is also that pesky little commonality of being human and oh so fallible. Again, perspective plays a huge part in how we live our lives, from the desire to experience all this world has to offer, to the debilitating fear of everything that we encounter. There is also the fact that perspective is just that. It is how we feel about or see something and it is not always based in fact. 

I have been thinking a lot about this recently. Maybe it is because this is a pivotal year for me (at least in my head). This year I turn 60, an age that I once viewed as ancient, I now see as still quite youngish....a big difference of perspective. This is also the year that Mr. David graduates or by now, has graduated. After 18 years of him being in school, he and I are both about to embark on a new chapter. My old perspective was one day at a time and with fingers crossed and a lot of prayers, maybe we will make it to graduation. My new perspective is a question mark. I have no idea what each new day will hold with him and me, but I will take it with gratitude and without fear. (The whole fear part where David is concerned is a huge change in perspective for me.)

Today, I dropped my little grandsons off for pre-k. It was their last day. It was an interesting year for both them and me with lots of unexpected twists and turns and I seem to remember last year at times, feeling very overwhelmed as I let the outside world creep in and color my view of my own world at home as well as theirs. Perhaps I let worldly fears and thoughts of the unknown, give me a false perspective on our life. Today, though, I realized that I am seeing these two amazing little humans in rays of positivity and hope. Both have progressed and learned and have the right to have not just the grandma they get, but more importantly, the grandma they deserve. I see now, that it is my job to shine a light on the good and positive things in their world, as well as to help them to maneuver the more scary and less positive things, helping them to understand that they are strong enough to not just survive, but also to thrive in whatever life throws at them. In some ways, this is the perspective I have always fallen back on, but I won't lie, these last two years have weakened it to some degree. Now I feel, that it is back much stronger than before. 

Speaking of strength, what about Miss W? Every day she changes and matures and it amazes me to see what a strong and beautiful young girl she is turning into. Next week she will be out of school for the year and I have no doubt by the time fall gets here, she will be taller and more full of life than she even is now. 

I think in the past I have viewed myself as someone on the sidelines cheering her on, but not really being much more than a spectator in her life. Recently though, I have realized that while most young girls love their daddies, they also need strong women in their lives to teach them how to be strong women themselves. I, along with her mom am one of those strong women in her life and it is my responsibility to do more than watch her grow and change. I am in the unique position to help her connect her future with my past and the lives of the women that have gone before her and to let her know where she came from and help guide her to where she is going. This is a definite change in perspective, allowing me to realize that perspective need not be chiseled in stone. 

The biggest difference in perspective for me though is the realization that there are those who need me around for as long as they can get me, and not as a sideline sitter or spectator, but as someone who walks along with them and isn't afraid to live life and show them how it's done. Previously, my brain had given me a bit of a negative perspective about the impending big 6 0 and what that might mean. I thought perhaps I should start slowing down and just accept aging (the good and the bad) as it comes with no pushback and no fight. Granted that became easier as this calendar year started with the flu and health issues with David, but then I realized that like everything else...."this too shall pass," but was I going to allow life to pass me by while I sat idly giving up and waiting to become old, or was I going to show my kids and grandkids how 60 and 70 and 80 really looked? I chose the latter and as I did, my perspective on life and my purpose in it, changed too. Look out world, 60 is just the beginning for this mama!

So yeah, perspective. We all have it and we live our lives and base our current actions and reactions on it. It's part of the whole human thing and at times, that perspective can be the gift God gives us to change our little piece of the world and make them better and more vibrant. At other times though, it can be the very thing that holds us in place and doesn't allow us to take chances, explore or even enjoy life because of fear or trepidation that things might not work out or be as we hope. If we keep in mind that perspective can be fluid and ever-changing with an open mind and our ability to allow new information in, then it can be the thing that makes 60 looks better than even 40 did and keep us happy, healthy, and forever young.