It's Simply a Faith Thing

Isn't it just like me? You don't hear from me for nearly a year and now suddenly, it's two days in a row. I promise that it is my intention to blog more in 2018 and more so, that they won't all be about this disaster I am currently dealing with. No....really!!! I have other life disasters that I can talk about! But today....I am processing and still need the writing therapy to get me through all of this.

This weekend was so surreal. Saturday I spent the day trying to understand how family can be so cold. No...not just family but MY family. It just was not sinking in. Yesterday I kept fluctuating between being sad, being angry and trying like hell to be understanding. My friend Marni's words kept going through my mind: There are 3 sides to every story. Your's, theirs and the truth. So what is this particular truth?

My first reaction upon hearing the news was to feel complete and total sorrow for both my dad and brother. I kept thinking how hard this must be for them to have to do this to me. I think I even apologized to them for having to go through such a thing. I remember thinking that because it must be so hard for them, that I had to handle this all with as much class and dignity as possible. Mostly I did not want my dad to be upset as his health isn't great and honestly even with our pasts....I couldn't for a moment think that either of them would deliberately do something like this to me. More over I couldn't fathom that they would do this to David. Hmmmmm I think I managed getting out of there with class and dignity...or at least my version of the two.

Then yesterday....... I didn't sleep much Saturday night, even as hard as I tried to shut my mind down. I prayed a lot and tried to imagine a positive end to this particular chapter of our story. Sleep was not my friend. So yesterday my mind began questioning what was truly behind this situation. Was this really a completely innocent action taken with the sole purpose of giving my dad financial peace of mind? If that was the case then as hard as this all is, it was understandable. BUT, why not include me in on the process and possibility that turned quickly to reality.... that my home was at stake? Why not give me a heads up and let me know that dad felt his living arrangements and financial security were in danger and therefore selling my house might ease that worry? I surely could have helped find other options and helped to ease that worry and not lose my home in the process. Was this whole thing then premeditated with the full intention of not only taking my home but causing me the absolute most stress while doing so? Can people, especially family really be that cruel? I still don't want to believe it, but at the very least, this whole thing was done in a very disrespectful, underhanded and humiliating way. It truly wasn't fair.

What was that? Life ain't fair. Yes, that is glaringly obvious.

Before I went to bed last night, I found myself starting to get angry at the unfairness of it all.Then I remembered that everything has purpose. There is purpose in this. Perhaps I need to appreciate things more and be more grateful. Perhaps I take things for granted too often. Maybe I need to realize that I need to give more, be kinder and not be so trusting of people (even family). Whatever the lesson is, I decided that I could be bitter or be busy. Bitterness takes you to a negative and unhealthy place pulling you down and backwards. If I get busy trying to fix things and improve my circumstances then I don't have time to be negative. All I have time to do is move forward. That is my choice.....busily moving forward.

Today I have been a bit overwhelmed. I hit the ground running but I have felt myself and my attention pulled in so many ways that focus has been hard to achieve. I have however been extremely busy. I have so many questions and so many things I need to check out and find out what my rights are and how I can continue to not only move forward but to also keep our home. It is truly a lot. Blessedly though, I am not doing this alone. My community, complete strangers and other wonderful family members and friends have stepped in and stepped up. Tonight is a community meeting to help plan a fundraiser. I am also told there have been many emails and calls to the Ellen show and the calls, texts, fb messages and donations we have received have been amazing. It just goes to show that blood doesn't have to be shared to be considered family. I don't think that I could be more grateful or more humbled right now.

So I move forward. I will likely never know the true motivation behind my "eviction" but I also can't sit around and worry about it either. All actions good or bad have consequences and this situation will be no different. As for me, I simply have to keep busy, be positive, fight like hell and learn everything from this experience that I am suppose to. I know everything else will eventually take care of itself. It's simply a faith thing!

Saving Our Home

Breathe! I AM strong! Breathe! I CAN do this! Breathe! I DO have faith! And then the old saying....If you worry why pray and if you pray why worry? It has all been swarming in my head like a nest of angry bees for the last 24 hours. What a difference a day makes! Truly.

I won't bore you with all the gory details of my current plight. If you want the details....check out my facebook page. The details are there. This is just me trying to process and figure out how I am going to handle this newest of drama's in my life and how I am going to continue to keep a roof over Davids head (preferably the only roof he has ever known) and how we as a family move forward.

Yes, it has been awhile since last we met here. So much has transpired so fast that I am still processing it all. In the last year, along with David whose health has always been a crap shoot, most everything I know about my world and my life has changed. Anything that I thought was secure has proven to be anything but, however, in this last year....I was reassured once again that upon my father's death, this house.....our home would be deeded into my name and my family would always have a roof over their head. Barring natural disaster, this was our home. Yesterday that all changed.

Now my home is nothing special to the naked eye. My home and I are the same age and since 1976, this home has been where my world began and ended. Except for a few years living elsewhere, just about every memory I have....both the good and bad are in the walls of this house. My late mothers yells of "LisaMarie....get down here," and my late husbands laughter still live in every fiber of it's make up. The parties my friends and I had when we were teenagers, the sleepovers and the smells of my mother canning still live here right along with me. My kids grew up here and David has come to rely on the comfort and security of this place as the one sure thing in his unsure world. His room means everything to him. It is his domain and his safe place and for him to have it taken away is just unthinkable to me.

Last night as you can well imagine, I barely shut an eye. As much as I tried to shut the insanity of the day off and rest, all I could do is think of each room and remember all the moments big and small that happened there. I could hear all the voices that have resided here and through the fighting of tears, think about those I lost here. This home is just such a part of us all. It was beyond heartbreaking to sit my kids down yesterday and tell them that by March 1st, this would no longer be our home. That everything I had ever promised them about always having a home here was just gone in one eviction notice.

And that eviction notice..... a notice that gives us less than 30 days to find a new home (with no money), move everything including our pool, deck and shed (otherwise it would become theirs) and never a word to me when they knew this was going to happen. I never knew an eviction notice could be so humiliating....especially when handed to you by family. So many emotions. "Just breathe," I kept telling myself as they sat their looking at me. The tears were right there but damned if I would let them see them. Damned if I would let them out. I still haven't.

Mixed in with all of this joy is the fact that David is to have a very extensive spine surgery in March. That has weighed on me terribly as I know what a difficult surgery, hospital stay and recovery this is going to be. When I mentioned this to my family while standing their holding eviction papers and trying to make sense of any of it, my brother simply looked at me and said, "Well, it's in March, so you'll be moved out by then." What does that even mean? All I could think was, I don't care how I feel about you or how you feel about me, if the shoe was on the other foot, I would never allow this to happen to you or your family. I would have fought for you. I would have found a way to make it all work without you losing your home. Without your son losing his home. But then again, maybe that is just me.

Then, last night I started thinking that with this, I am losing so much more than just my home. If I had to move right now, where would I go? Likely we will not be able to find a place big enough for us and affordable here in my home town. So then what? David loses his school? The people he has known his whole entire life? Really? And what about our dogs? The dogs we love that are as much a part of our family as the two legged animals running around here? Spud and Gizzy are old dogs and this is the only home they have ever known. What if we can't keep them? What if we don't have a backyard for our beautiful baby Shane? What if I don't have a place big enough for Davids equipment, for my grandchildren and for the few things I really love? The tears almost came. They are almost coming now, but damned if I will let them.

I have many wonderful friends out there who want to help. They are trying to help with advice, suggestions and even financial help. Oh and don't think that wasn't difficult and demoralizing to know that we are such a charity case that I had to air all of this on facebook and beg for help. I truly hope no one I know ever has to feel that much humiliation, but then again, the circumstances of my life made me check any ounce of pride I ever had long ago. I am left humbled with the realization that blessedly there are many good people out there and very undeservedly, I have some very good friends and an amazing community. Whatever comes of all of this, the bottom line is.....I will be paying it forward and giving back every chance I get....for the rest of my life.

I am keeping the faith and praying like crazy. I know that regardless of how this all turns out, life goes on. The world keeps turning and God will see us through. I also know though, that God expects me to fight for my family, for my home and most of all for David.

If you would like to help please head over to our YouCaring page. If you can help financially that would be amazing, but if you can't, please share and most of all, please pray that we get the miracle we need and are able to keep our home. 

The Boy (Based on a true Story)

His blue eyes danced as the excitement of the house made him giggle. Today was a special day and the little blonde haired boy was so happy. He wasn’t sure but it seemed like a really long time since he had been this happy. The mom seemed a little stressed as she packed up the little one lying in the crib. He was still fragile and required a bag full of “stuff” every time he left the house. The blonde haired boy though, loved the little one and even though he was only 5 years old, he understood that the little life there in the crib, almost didn’t make it home.

The boy remembered the many days and nights that he and his older brother had to stay at home while Mom and Dad spent many long hours at the hospital. He remembered the tears in his mom’s eyes when he went to the hospital and they were all told by the doctor that his baby brother might not make it through the day. He was told to say goodbye, but he refused. Instead he reached in the clear crib where his youngest sibling lay and quietly whispered, “You’ll be fine. I talked to the Blessed Mama and she told me,” referring to a long talk that he had, alone in his room with Jesus’s mom.

The boy had been right. His baby brother had come home and in his eyes, that baby was perfect. Since he had come home though, life had been busy and this new little family member took a lot of care. The boy had long since realized that his days as the baby of the family were over and truthfully, it hadn’t really bothered him giving up the title as he never much liked being called a baby. He knew that the new baby had fought hard all those months in the hospital and he deserved a little babying and special treatment in his life, so Mom and Dad fussing over him really wasn’t so bad.

Today though, it was going to be different. Mom and the little one and the older one were all leaving and it was just going to be him and Dad. The boy could hardly contain his excitement. It was just two days until the 4th of July and he and Dad were going to get fireworks….together….just the two of them. He couldn’t wait and he giggled and bounced around as Mom finished packing up the baby and tried her hardest to motivate the older one out the door. Earlier, Mom and Dad had talked about the baby staying home and the boy had stood back breathlessly waiting for the verdict. He would have said nothing and would have shared the day with the little one, but when Mom said, “No….I’ll take him. You guys just need to go have some fun,” the boy’s heart nearly leapt out of his chest. It was going to be just him and Dad and he was so excited.

As Mom drove out of the driveway, the boy stood looking at his dad. He didn’t know if all dads were as great as his dad, but he knew his dad was the best. His dad was his hero. He had a loud booming laugh that rang through the house. He was smart because he worked on airplanes and the boy just knew you had to be really smart to do that. His dad had a beautiful voice and he loved to dance and the boy loved listening to his dad sing with the radio and then grab his mom and dance through the living room with her. Yes, he had the best dad in the world and now standing there looking up at him, he knew that today, this day was theirs…..all theirs and he couldn’t wait to get it started. This might just be his best day ever.

The boy’s dad grabbed him up and said, “How about we go get some fireworks?” The boys blue eyes began to sparkle. Spending time together AND fireworks!!!! This day was going to be so cool.

The dad took the boy back to the master bathroom and told him he needed to get in the shower. The boy quickly undressed and jumped in the shower. He scrubbed himself as quickly as he could and then yelled to his dad to help him turn the water off. The dad came walking back with a cup of coffee and a pack of cigarettes. The bathroom was the only room the mom would let him smoke in. He helped the boy out of the shower, wrapped him in a towel and sent him into the master bedroom where he had already laid the boys clothes out. “Now you stay in here and get dressed,” the dad instructed, “and I will take my shower. Then when I get out, I’ll get dressed and we will get our day started.”

Once again the boy could hardly contain his excitement as his blue eyes were clear blue sparkling pools. The dad was almost as excited as the boy. This after all was one of the first times in a very long time that it felt as if the family was starting to find its way back to a new kind of normal. Now, being able to spend this day with this little blonde haired boy who had stayed calm and cool during the last few months when everyone else was anything but, who had constantly told everyone that would listen that his little brother would be fine and who had welcomed his new sibling without envy or attitude….gave this dad pure joy. He planned to take his son and let him choose anything he wanted at the fireworks stand. Today, money didn’t matter. All that mattered was the two of the spending time together and making his little boy laugh and smile as much as possible.

The dad opened the ventilation window above the toilet and then sat down next to the toilet and proceeded to set his coffee next to him on the floor. The bathroom wasn’t huge, but he had found a comfortable spot between the wall and the toilet to sit, drink coffee and have a cigarette. He lit his cigarette and took a sip of his coffee. Mentally he was planning the day ahead and trying to imagine the boy’s excitement when he told him that he could have ANYTHING he wanted at the firework stand. He put the cigarette to his lips, took a long drag and……..

The boy was hurriedly drying off and trying to dress. He wanted to be ready as soon as his dad was out of the shower. He heard the clank of his dad’s coffee cup hit the floor and he could smell the smoke from his cigarette. He knew Dad wasn’t in the shower yet and that it would likely be a few before he finished his cigarette. The boy felt a twinge of disappointment that his dad didn’t get directly in the shower, but then again….he knew he never did. Then he heard a single word…..”Ouch.” There was another sound but the boy wasn’t sure what the sound was. Gingerly he pressed his ear to the bathroom door and tentatively said, “Dad?” There was no answer. The dad always answered. So the boy knocked. Still no answer. Confused, the boy opened the door.

The dad lay with his head between the toilet and the wall. He held a lit cigarette and his coffee cup sat on the floor by his side. His eyes were closed but there was a slight gurgling sound coming from his chest. The boy’s eyes grew wide as he tried to understand what lay before him. Then he knew, his dad was teasing him. His dad loved to kid around. He carefully walked closer to his dad, expecting at any moment that he would jump up and grab him, all the while laughing his booming laugh…but there was no movement. “Dad,” the boy said. Then more quietly, “Daddy.” The gurgling continued. Maybe he passed out the boy thought. Using the extent of his 5 year old knowledge, he picked up the now luke warm coffee cup and he poured the coffee in his dads face. There was nothing…not even the slightest movement. It was at that moment that the boy knew. He took the still burning cigarette from his father’s hand. He squashed it out in the ashtray next to his dad, just as he had seen him do it a million times.

The boy sat there. He touched his dad’s hand. It was warm and rough as always. At that moment, he knew that hand was the hand he loved the most in the world. He wanted with all of his heart for that hand to reach up and grab his. He wanted to feel the warmth and security of his own small hand wrapped deep inside his father’s big and safe hand. No!!!! He wanted his daddy to sit up and smile at him. He wanted to sit in his lap and feel those arms around him. He didn’t want his dad just to lay there, covered in coffee with that horrible gurgling sound going on. Then it stopped and the boy just sat there, his blue eyes now a steel grey as he continued holding his dad’s hand and watching his dad’s face turn from a pink to a grayish color. Slowly the warmth was leaving his dad’s fingers and the boy just wanted this to be a dream. He kept thinking that he wanted to wake up. He wanted to run into his mom and dad’s bedroom and hug his dad. He wanted to tell his dad about the awful dream and he wanted to hear his dad say, “It was just a dream. I am fine.” He wanted to get fireworks. He wanted to hear his dad laugh and sing and he wanted to watch his dad dance with his mom across the living room floor. Most of all though, he didn’t want to be there alone. His young brain was beyond full and he was trying to process the most unthinkable situation and it simply wasn’t possible. He was alone and suddenly he was scared.

The boy had never been home alone and this was the worst way to have that experience for the first time. Fighting back the tears he looked behind him and the family dog sat quietly, just watching. He obviously had no idea what to do either. The boy tentatively pulled his hand away from his dad. He knew this might be the last time he felt that hand, but waves of reality kept hitting him. He was alone, he was scared and he knew that his dad was gone. He looked at his father’s face, looking lifeless and colorless and he quietly whispered “Goodbye Daddy.” He then made his way to the dog. He buried his face in the fur of the animal and let out a sob. The dog whimpered sensing how devastated his little human was.

The boy, still scared, still alone and still not knowing how to handle the way his world had just changed, slowly walked to his bedroom. The dog followed. As the boy walked in his room, all the things he loved, all the things that made him happy and all the things that made him secure, no longer existed. He just wanted to feel safe and he didn’t know how to do that. The boy walked towards his bed and grabbed his pillow and blanket and then he got down on his knees and crawled under his bed. The space was small, but then so was he. The dog, knowing how much the boy needed him, got down on his belly and pulled himself under the bed too and lay his head on the boys stomach. Together they remained like this for what seemed like forever.

The boy startled awake and the dog whimpered at the boys’ sudden movement. For a second the boy thought it might all have really been a dream. Then he looked up to see the bottom of his bed and his heart sank once again. He had no idea how long he had been under the bed nor did he know when anyone would be home. Then the fleeting thought went through his head, what if they don’t come back? He knew deep inside they would, but what if they didn’t? He continued to lay there, the dog never moving from his side and the boy wondering one thing….Why?

Suddenly the dog whimpered loudly and backed out from under the bed. The boy lay there listening. The car door shut. Then another. THEY WERE HOME!!!!! The boy quickly rolled out from under the bed and rushed down the hall. He ran to the door and opened it just as his mom, with the baby and his older brother stepped in. A huge uncontrollable sob welled up and escaped his chest and then the words that he knew to be true, but the words he hadn’t been able to say finally came exploding out as 
he grabbed his mom and held her tightly. “Mommy, Daddy is dead!” And as she looked into those eyes that had aged a hundred years since she had left that morning….she knew it was true.

Life Isn't Fair

I have been thinking about my mom a great deal lately. It is not surprising since her birthday was just a few days ago. She taught me a lot of things and maybe one of the most important things she taught me was that life is simply not fair.

My mom was not a "sugarcoat things" kind of mom. She knew that once I left home and got out into the real world, that life would not be easy on me and that I would need some sound life skills, so she never let me believe that I was special, deserved special treatment or that life was fair in anyway. On the contrary, she taught me that we are all special in our own way, but no one was above the other. No ones thoughts, opinions or beliefs were greater than anyone else's and that many times in life mine would be trudged through the mud because......life isn't fair. She taught me that no matter what I did in life or how far I went, I would never be any better than anyone else. However....she expected me to always act with kindness, show respect to my elders (whether I agreed with them or not and whether they were right or not), to act with dignity and class under all circumstances and to always remember that the world owed me nothing. She told me that if I were to ever achieve anything that I must work hard for it and that if I really really wanted something in life......I had to work extremely hard for it. I was taught that nothing is really free in this life, that you don't get points just for showing up and that yes in fact.....life is always a competition of sorts whether it is with ourselves or others. That is what makes us try harder and makes us better at anything we do.

So yeah, those were some pretty heavy life lessons and truthfully, they were pretty well instilled in me by the time I was old enough to start school and definitely by the time I hit junior high. It didn't stop life's disappointments.....i.e. not getting to hang out with a certain group of kids because my parents didn't make enough money, not winning a spelling bee that I had studied weeks for, not making the softball team, basketball team, volleyball team. Yes....there was theme there. I was not athletically inclined and trust me....back then not everyone who tried out got to make the team just because it was "fair" and you didn't get a participation award just for showing up. In other words, my mom's lessons helped to keep me realistic in life and helped me to pick myself up when life didn't seem to treat me fairly. Why? Because I had no expectation that life would treat me fairly.

These lessons have continued to help me through the jobs I applied for but wasn't chosen for, the relationships that went south and even the deaths of those I loved. I knew life wasn't fair but I also knew I wasn't singled out. Life isn't fair for anyone. It is what makes us stronger.

Today though, the younger generation just doesn't get this. Maybe because my generation was brought up by parents that didn't sugarcoat anything and because some of life's lessons were very painful, my generation tried to make it easier for our kids. Maybe because at times we got left out, over looked or just plain stomped on, we didn't want our kids to feel that pain. Maybe we wanted our kids to feel special, included and we wanted to help them avoid as much pain as possible....so we forgot to tell them that life just isn't fair. Trust me, we did them no favors.

We now have a generation of kids that think they are entitled and feel no need to work hard for anything. We have a generation of kids that expects the world to hand them things and give them things without having to put effort into getting them. They feel that they deserve kudos just for showing up and that they somehow deserve more than anyone else, their opinion is more important than anyone else's and that no matter what....life should be fair and they should always get their way.

Because of this way of thinking, we have a generation of lost souls sitting on their parents couches and waiting for the world to give them jobs where they are treated fairly and they can call their own shots and make lots of money without putting in the actual work. They want to be taken care of by the government and their parents and get extremely angry when anyone suggests that they take care of themselves. They are out fighting for rights they haven't earned and demanding that they be heard as if their voices were the only voices worthy of being heard.

We have raised a very angry stressed generation of kids because they were never taught one simple rule.....life is not fair. They can't handle job disappointments, being broken up with by their significant other or even being told "No!" Because of the simple fact that this generation doesn't understand that life isn't fair, the use of illegal drugs, pills and recreational marijuana is off the charts. Suicide rates are astronomical and the amount of kids past 18 into their late 20's who are unfocused and often times unemployed is higher than it has ever been. I was also reading that there was a huge decline in church going in the age category from 18 to 35 and a lot of this was attributed to this generation feeling that they are owed. How does that work?

It appears that like everyone else.....God owes these guys something. Forget the fact that He gave up His only son for us. Apparently that was not enough, so when life does what it invariably does and proves that it is often times not fair, they blame God....some to the point of denying His existence. They have no understanding of the fact that their lives may not be great through their own actions or inaction, after all....God does not control us. He gave us free will, but it is so much easier to blame God than to admit that maybe we did something to cause our own situation.

What this generation does not understand is that the way they are going, they will never be better because the unfairness of the world is what makes us better. The fact that I was not good at basketball but some other girl was may not have been fair, but if I had truly loved basketball (I did not) I could have worked my rear end off to have been a better player and I, myself could have evened the playing field a bit. I would also have gotten lessons in hard work, perseverance and self respect. If at the end of the day I still didn't make the team, well then at least I would have known I gave it my best shot and had to admit that maybe basketball just wasn't for me. At any rate....I was not owed a place on the team just because I wanted it.

Yes, I am on a bit of a soap box today. I guess I am tired of people feeling that just because they exist, they somehow are owed. No, my life wasn't always easy and trust me, when I didn't make a team, lost a boyfriend or didn't get a job I applied for, my mom wasn't standing there saying, "Ah poor baby. Those people are mean and awful and you deserved to get what you wanted." No she was standing there saying, "Don't give up. Try again, but remember.....life isn't fair and you won't always get what you want, but it certainly doesn't keep you from trying again now does it?"

Mulvane Pizza Hut....A Second Chance for a First Time Manager

I am all about my community and whenever I can help, I try to. In a small town, your businesses are crucial and I try hard to promote our businesses and remind people of how important they are to us. I am going to start a new series that will be posted on our local pages that will highlight our small town and the businesses that are helping it to grow and I will throw in a little business love.....whenever I can. So here it goes........

Do you know Billy Carroll? If you don’t, then maybe you should.

Billy is the manager of the Mulvane Pizza Hut. I got to know him back in July when I was having a garage sale and a friend and I were craving pizza. We decided to try out the local PH “again” as it had been a long while since either of us had been there.

To be honest, I wasn’t very excited as I had been there about 18 months prior and I was not only disappointed in the place but I also left angry. I had gone in there for the lunch buffet. There were maybe three customers in there at the time. There were two kinds of pizza on the buffet and it was obvious they had been sitting there for a while as they were cold and dry looking. The salad bar was anything but fresh as the lettuce was wilted and the cottage cheese smelled very suspicious. The one waitress that was working was behind the counter on her cell phone the entire time I was there and I never got the drink I ordered. When I went up to pay for what was edible of my lunch, I asked to speak to the manager who the girl told me was not there. I went home, waited a while and called PH asking once again for the manager. She had apparently returned and when I reported my lunch experience, she basically told me that I was a liar and that my business was not necessary to her. Their delivery service was also on the same par. It was simply awful. So you can imagine that my craving for pizza that July day was pretty powerful to even consider going to PH and trying the buffet again. I can honestly say though, it was one of the best decisions I have made in a while.

Going in that day, the difference was night and day. The place was spotless. The wait staff was friendly and attentive (didn’t see one cell phone), our drinks were brought out promptly and the buffet was fresh and had many varieties of hot pizza to choose from. The salad bar reminded me of days gone by when the PH buffet was one of the best lunch venues in town. I was pleasantly surprised as was my friend.

It was this day that I got to meet Billy Carroll. He was the new General Manager and had only been in charge just a few months. He came out to our table and checked on us making sure we were well served and happy with our lunches. We were ecstatic and told him so. On talking to him, you hear a wonderful southern drawl in his voice as his answers were always enhanced with “Yes ma’am” and “Thank you ma’am.” He was professional, charming and very down to earth. In other words, his management skills far surpassed my last manager experience in the place.

After talking to him that day, I decided that the Mulvane Pizza Hut needed a little love. I knew just from town talk, that many in our community had quit going to PH because of similar past experiences to mine. What used to be the place for teachers, business people and families at the noon hour had become a shell of its former self because of poor service and a lack of desire to put the work in to making it a successful and speedy lunch time choice. I decided to learn more about Billy and the PH of today.

Billy graduated high school in 2008 and decided to make the move from his home state of Alabama to the Wichita area. While he worked several different places, over time PH became a job he knew well and stuck with. Working between the Rose Hill PH and Mulvane, Billy went from cook to shift manager and then finally, general manager. By starting basically from the ground up, he learned the business inside out and knew what made a good employee as well as what made the customers happy. As GM, he began applying the skills he learned.

Billy was very honest about his first three months as GM of PH. “They were awful! Plain and simple.” He spent his time trying to fix what was broken at the restaurant and trying to learn what Mulvane customers were looking for in their PH. In all fairness though, he was fighting an uphill battle within the community as he had inherited a wait staff and bad business practices from past managers. He had to start fresh and give Mulvane a reason to come back and give PH a second chance under his new management. How was he doing this? By insisting on good service and an ever present smile from his wait staff, a fully stocked and fresh noon-time buffet and if a mistake happens (as they often do dealing with humans and all) a prompt and courteous resolution to their problem. Sometimes this means him calling the customer personally and letting them know he knows of the problem and he is fixing it.

Billy’s managerial skills seem to be working, because when I went in there the other day to talk to him, the lunch hour was going strong. As he talked to me about his love for his job and his affection for his customers, he pointed to several in the restaurant and told me, “I know my customers. That guy in the white hat, he gets Dr. Pepper no ice and the salad bar. His wife, tea with lemon and also the salad bar. These people are my customers and I know their orders. I work to give them the best.” All I could think was “WOW!”

So I asked Billy, if he felt that PH was now on the right track and what he would like to see in the future. His reply, “I have a huge mountain to climb to gain back the communities confidence in PH and I don’t feel that I am even half way there yet.” It’s true. Mulvane is like any place else, especially when there is an ever growing number of choices for people to eat. If a person gets burned enough times at a restaurant, they will take their business and hard earned money elsewhere. Getting that business back, even under new management can be a tricky proposition.

As for the future of the Mulvane Pizza Hut, Billy’s ideas and enthusiasm for the possibilities were refreshing. He says he plans to continue building staff. It is a bit of a tightrope as he is also trying to rebuild his customer base. As people are hearing word of mouth that the PH under his management is a head and shoulders above the past and his numbers are steadily growing, there is still that up and down business thing where one day they are packed at the lunch hour and the next they may have only half that number, so keeping the right amount of staff right now is tricky. It is getting better though. PH currently has four delivery drivers, two cooks, two shift managers, three servers and Billy. As business increases, these numbers will change.

He is also hoping down the line to get more use out of his conference room. It is a great place to have a noon time meeting with the buffet for lunch. Quick, easy and efficient. They have also had clubs such as a card club who use the room and enjoy a game of cards and the buffet. It would also be great for a special events or parties. It is a great space that because of past experiences is getting overlooked by the community.

Billy also pointed out that during the lunch hour teachers get a 10% discount when they eat there and military always gets a 15% discount. “It’s all about serving the community.”

Down the line, he hopes to institute a possible 2pm-4pm happy hour where you get a drink and a slice of pizza. He also has a couple of other exciting ventures that he would like to keep under his hat pending corporate approval, but when approved will be great for Mulvane and for business.

The bottom line is, the Mulvane Pizza Hut has been a long time staple in our community. Yes, it has gone through some damaging times, but Billy Carroll is working daily to bring it back to what it used to be……a great place to have a quick and delicious lunch at the buffet, an evening sit down dinner with the family or a convenient way to have hot and delicious pizza delivered to your door.

Please though, don’t take my word for this. Go in there, introduce yourself to this hardworking young man (Billy Carroll) and give our PH another chance. I think, like me……you will be very glad you did!

Lives

A short story about....lives.

The white persons life is no more important than the black persons life. The black persons life is no more important than the policemans life. The policeman's life matters as much as the firemans and the fireman's as much as the politicians. The politicians life is no more important than the the voters life and the voters life is equally as important as the Presidents. ThePresidents life is not above the Popes life and the Popes life is as important as the Rabbi's. The Rabbi's life is no greater than the ministers and the ministers is equal to those in his congregation. Not one in the congregation has a life that is more important than the atheists and the atheist's life is just as important as the Christians. The Christians lives are equal to but not more important than the addicts life and the addicts life is just as important as the doctors life. A doctors life is not above his patients life and a mothers life is not more important than her unborn childs life. A muslims life is as important as a Buhdist life and country person's life is no less important than a city person's life. A straight persons life is equally important as a gay person's life and a college educated persons life is not above that of a drop out person's life.The homeless persons life is no less important than the rich persons life and the bank investors life is no more important than the day laborors life. The bullies life is no greater than the life of the one he bullies and the teacher's life is every bit as important as the students life. The disabled persons life is as important as the star athletes life and the restaurant servers life is as important as the restaurant owners life. The husbands life is not above his wifes life and the sisters life is every bit as important as the brothers life. So I guess the moral to this story is.....ALL lives matter!

My One and Only 2016 All Out Political Blog

I don't normally talk politics anymore, because....well.....I like to keep my sanity! Yesterday though, when the FBI decided not to proceed with action against Hillary Clinton, I did make a post on Facebook that expressed my frustration. It was fairly short and sweet and then I got busy and didn't come back to it until the middle of the night. What I saw at that point was interesting, disappointing to some degree and a bit scary knowing that this was just the tip of the iceberg as to where this country and it's people are headed. So, I decided to put my full two cents in this one time and then do a lot of praying between now and November.

Please keep in mind that this is my opinion and they are my thoughts and YES....I am entitled to them!!! Please also remember that I don't expect or demand that my family and friends feel the same. I do however expect and yes....even demand, that you respect my right to believe as I do, just as I respect your right to believe as you do.

It used to be that whether you were Republican or Democrat/conservative or liberal......we all wanted basically the same things for this country. We simply were going at those things from different angles. Yes, there were political disagreements, but we all had the common sense to know that we were going after the same things so we didn't tear each other apart in pursuit of our goals.

I know our current political situation did not happen over night, nor was it the responsibility of just one party. We have been running headlong into our current place in history for many years, even decades but the last couple of decades have been almost dibilating and who will pay for this? Our children. 

We have lost all perspective of who we are as a country and as a people. We are not perfect and never have been because we are human, but somewhere along the line.....we have lost track of what this country was founded on. We have lost our pride, our dignity and our respect for those who have fought and died for this country, those who started this country and those we call fellow human beings. We forgot that we aren't owed anything from anyone and that includes our government or our fellow man. We also forgot things like "anything worth having is worth working for," that "some things are worth fighting and yes.....even dying for" and worst of all, we forgot that "if you don't give respect.....you don't get respect."

In the 1970's, my mother made a profound statement to me that I have never forgotten. It was after Roe v. Wade. Her heart broke that our government made abortion legal and basically said that one human life trumps another "innocent" human life, therefore making it legal to murder/kill/destroy another human life at will. She said, "when we make it easy to disrespect an "innocent" human life in such a way, it will be no time before no life will be respected and we will all be animals in the street killing, maiming and destroying life at will." Forty plus years later and she wasn't wrong. I truly believe that this one act of legislation set the course of things to come.

I will now say, that our last GREAT president was Ronald Reagan. I know there will be many of you that have already started throwing your hissies just hearing the name, but in my opinion....this is pure fact. Did Reagan do it all right as president? No. He was human. Did Reagan lead to the best of his ability? You darn right he did! He was great not because of every decision he ever made, but he was great because of his ability to unite the American people. He never made it an us against them among us.....it was an us against them when it came to our enemies and our enemies knew that he was not playing. Reagan was a strong American who believed in a strong America. He made no bones about where the United States stood and what action would be taken if our enemies disrespected us. He was a diplomat and right or wrong.....he always put the American people and the best interest of this country first....to the best of his ability. Not since this man left office have we had a president who has done this....and it shows.

Bush the first, was not presidential material. He tried but the shoes left to fill were way to big for him. He may actually have been the start of what we are reaping today. Bill Clinton was a lot of things, unfortunately being a man of integrity or honesty were not among those things. Clinton could talk the talk, but he could not walk the walk. Luckily for him, he had Monica Lewinsky to redirect and divert attention away from his presidency and he had a faction of the American people willing to be charmed into believing that a president who molests interns and lies about it to the American people all while openly cheating on his wife, is acceptable. Many excused his actions saying that it was his private life, however.....his private actions happened in his business arena and lets face it, if he so easily lied about that, can you be sure he doesn't lie about other things? It speaks to his character as a man and he proved he would lie to save his own skin.

And how about that Hillary? She is not a friend of the truth herself. Apparently her and Bill are of the same character. She would prove that again and again over time. And let us not forget that long before the Clintons came to Washington, there is well documented information on how they conducted themselves and their lack of character going back to Arkansas. Yet somehow, the American people apparently no longer felt that we should hold our president to a higher standard than to be a liar and a philandarer. Now mind you.....Bill is a democrat and his behavior was both accepted and forgiven by democrats far and wide. Think for a minute if you will, if this same behavior had happened to either of the Bush's or Reagan. They would have been tarred and feathered out of the White House and the democrats would have shown no mercy. You know I am right. 

Bush Jr. What can we say about him? I sincerely believe he came into office with one goal....to finish what his daddy started. Putting aside all the conspiracy theories.....9/11 gave him what he wanted. Should we have gone to war after 9/11? Yes. Plain and simple because based on the information he had and the American people had, we were full on attacked and when you are attacked, you fight back. You have to show a strong front to your enemies and make them aware that some things are worth fighting for.......like freedom. I think though, after the initial call to war, we became lost in a never ending battle that should have taken much less time and should have been much more effective. Bush will not go down in the history books as our finest presidential hour.....especially after 8 years. 

Then came Barrack Obama. This man was nearly as charming as Bill Clinton and many voted for him not because of his credentials but because of his skin color. It was time for a black president! Yes, maybe it was, but not him. The whole rationale of choosing skin color over credentials was racist in itself. It set the stage for many things to come.

I won't even go into the damage he has done to us financially as a country (bye bye A+ rating), nor what he has done to healthcare. And I won't touch upon the fact that he still takes regular bows for work Navy Seals did. And just to keep it real.....I won't even mention Benghazi. What I will talk about is what he has done to the American people. He has single handedly put American race relations back generations. He has caused a divide among the American people that will take decades to fix. He has race baited and if not caused, then supported unrest between blacks and whites and blacks and police. Instead of using his position to unite, he has actively used it to divide and has taken us back to a very dark place in history where Americans are on the verge of both civil and race wars. Not only this, but he has also very methodically worked to make Americans government dependent all while growing governments reach and position. No longer is it about standing on our own two feet, taking care of ourselves and our families and working for what we have. Now it is about government handouts, government freebies and scariest of all.......the government protecting us. We are now taking uncomfortable chapters of history out of our history books, rewriting the past and focusing on it instead of moving forward as a united people.

Gone are the days when free enterprise, inguenuity and hardwork were deemed good things. We have become a glutonous country with a population that doesn't want to work and wants to take from those who do and our president perpetuates this mentality. We feel owed everthing and we have a generation of kids who feel that the government will protect them and take care of them and they can just stare at their phones all day and do as they like. We have a people that will kill over the color of skin, demand their lives be respected and matter, and yet will disrespect the lives of others. We have people that will destroy and loot their own neighborhoods because they don't like a legal judgment and then turn around and expect others tax dollars to fix the damage. Does Obama speak out against this behavior? No...he apologizes to them and sides with their bad behavior....much like he apologizes to our enemies over things the American people should not be apologizing for. He weakens us on every level.....all while promising to protect us. No one else finds this bad and even dangerous form for the president?????

Obama has opened our country up to illegal immigrants and rather than work to became Americans, they take jobs at lower pay, live off the government, get free healthcare and educations and then feel persecuted when legal Americans take offense. I have no problem with anyone coming to this country with a full desire to become an American and work hard and make their own American dream. It is what our country is founded on. My family were immigrants and when they came over to this country, while becoming American citizens they were treated as immigrant scum. They worked as slave labor, were treated as property and NO.....Irish immigrant lives did NOT matter. We did it the right way though. We worked hard and the American dream became our dream....legally. What's more, I am pretty sure we have put the past in the past and I don't blame today's protestant American's for treating my Irish Catholic ancestors like property or a subhuman species. Oops....sorry about the Irish immigrant tangent. 

Ultimately though, by opening our country up to illegals we are messing with jobs, wages, government funds and yes, our safety. Obama seems to be okay with this. I however....am not.

Now we are faced with an election year. The three front runners were Bernie Sanders a socialist running for the democratic party, Hillary Clinton a democrat who up until yesterday was under FBI investigation and Donald Trump, a republican who has no political back ground. Sounds like the bottom of the barrel politicaly and as if the American people had the worst of the worst to pick from.

What I found scary was that the Democratic party split right down the middle when during the primaries, people jumped on the Bernie bandwagon more than happy to sell this country out to socialism. I heard remarks and justifications such as...."we have been a socialist country for years", "Bernie will even things out," (I assume this meant that Bernie will make us all poor and get rid of the American dream unless of course your American dream is to work hard and give it all away), and of course the young people were on board becasue in most cases their extent of political understanding comes from CNN and Facebook. I have a feeling our founding fathers were rolling in their graves which could explain a lot of those earthquakes and global warming we have been dealing with. The interesting thing, a lot of people who had previously shouted Hillary's name to the roof tops suddenly wanted nothing to do with her. She was evil and not good presidential material. No one really wanted to admit they ever even supported Hillary.

Bernie bombed. Guess what? Hillary is the greatest thing since sliced bread again! I am sure some of you would like me to forget I saw you flip flop on Hillary, but I can't. In my opinion after the way Hillary has conducted herself even before Washington, as the first lady and Bill's spouse and in these last few years I find her a liar who will say and/or do anything to protect her own hide (yep she is Bill's wife). She is as anti-woman as it comes as she talks a good game about women all the while knowing how Bill has treated women. She hereself has demonized those women so I don't see her as a great proponent for women. She has allowed soldiers and diplomats to die while comforting their families with the calous words, "What difference does it make?" Yes, there was more to what she said, but those were words that she never should have said. So this woman, with all the finese of an ogre and all the character of a snake, that lies as easily as she breathes, obviously puts her greed for power above what is right and best for this country and SHE is running for the highest office in this country and WE are good with that?

Then there is Donald Trump. I see a lot of never Trump! things posted. Why? Before his run for office, Trump was fairly well respected in the business world. If people didn't particularly like him, they did respect his business accumen. Yes, he had successful businesses and some not so successful businesses. All really financially successful people usually do. I find it funny that some of the people who now speak out against him were some of those who were fighting to be in his presence and be connected with his name and bask in his social circle when he was merely a businessman. I agree that Trump is brash and that he has rough political edges. However, he came into this campaign I believe trying to be as unpolitically correct as possible. I think he knew that the American people were sick and tired of being "correct" when all it has done is get us into this cluster of 2016. He grew supporters by openly saying some things that maybe needed to be said. Things many of us had thought all along, but couldn't because we would be branded a racist for going against not a man, but a black man....regardless of whether what he said or did was right or not.

We have had decades of politicians and all they have done is wreck our economy, circumvent our constitution and further their own powerful political agenda's. It has been a long time since we had a politician in office whose heart beat for this country and not for their own grab at power. Now we have a businessman whom I am sure has his own grab at power in sight, but also I honestly think he loves this country. This country has been good to him. Free enterprise has been good to him. He wants a chance at the American dream....and part of that is running for the White House. Does he not deserve the same right as any other American?

I find it interesting that some of the things that many have degraded Trump for, they have found acceptable in other presidents and presidential candidates. Trumps love of women is not acceptable, but Bills was. Trump makes "presumed" racist remarks and that is not acceptable, but Obama's out right racist attitude and willingness to divide this country are perfectly fine.

So why does Trump scare us so? Why never Trump? Is it because he is not a career politician? Perhaps it is because he has a rogue mouth and attitude. Maybe it is because regardless of his enemies, he is still pushing forward and he is a viable possibility as our next president?!

Quite frankly this election scares me to death. Yes, the candidates give me pause, but more over.....it is the people that scare me. There is an underlying willingness for the American people to turn on each other at the drop of a hat. They will pull faux information out of thin air and claim it as fact going after anyone.... friend or otherwise to have their facts viewed as  "right." People are tearing into each other and acting like rabid animals. Individuals who I know are educated suddenly are becoming politically ignorant listening to what they want to hear and only hearing "the truth" if they want it to be the truth. There is no longer a respect for those with differening opinions or political views and I fear for this country and the people......regardless of how this election turns out.

I love this country. I love my freedom and quite frankly......not voting is not an option. I will vote but before that, I will continue to watch the candidates, listen to what they say and research not only their political/business backgrounds but also their characters. I will do my own research and not rely on Facebook, main stream media or anyone elses opinion. When I do cast my ballot, I will know in my heart that while participating in this great right and responsibility, that I am voting my conscience and that it will be a decision..... that I can live with for the next four years.