Friday, October 28, 2011

Some Days Just Suck!

Some days just suck! No matter how hard we try to change the course of events....things just go from bad to worse. Z is having one of those days as we speak. He is learning that sometimes bad days have a domino affect and getting things back on track is almost just have to go with it.....ride the storm out....and pray that when all is said and can laugh at both the situation and yourself.

So far Z's day has gone like this: He tried out for a musical part in the Christmas program and in his words..."he bombed worse than anyone ever." Now I sincerely doubt that is the case, but I pointed out that never has he bombed. He is used to applause and ovations. Every high has a low and we don't learn from the high's. We learn tons from the lows. While he and I both know my words are sage and come from a place of deep knowledge....that doesn't help when both your ego and your spirit feel tromped on.

Next he gets chewed out from the office because he parked in the wrong place in the parking lot. put it bluntly those ladies in the office are..........! Nope, I am going to take the high road, but they have made no bones about the fact that they don't care for Z nor do they care for me. Guess what? The feeling is mutual, but one in particular has gone out of her way on more than one occasion to be down right nasty to both Z and I. Yeah....working with kids and their parents is her calling! But I digress. This is Z's first week driving and I know that in his cautiousness.....he is trying to park strategically so that when he leaves school he has the path of least resistance. Still and all though....he needs to learn to pay attention and read signs and know that VISITORS PARKING is actually for the visitors. Instead of saying please move your car though.....they in Z's words.....yelled at him. Now were they their usual nasty selves or did Z just feel yelled at because he already was stinging from the earlier mishaps? I would say it could go either way.

While he was moving his car though....he called me for some words of encouragement and possible ideas on how not to have the entire day tank. I told him it was just one day and he would get through it. He had his doubts but said he was going to do his best. Poor just wasn't in the cards for him.

About 20 min. ago I got another call from him. His day in fact did go from bad to worse. First of all when he came back into school after moving his car he was given the third degree by those ever so sweet office bi....errrr....ladies asking him why it took him so long to move his car. He said he had a call from me. (A small lie but definitely understandable in light of events.) They then told him that better NOT happen again. Nice to see their brooms are up and running in time for Halloween. (Grrrr) While this didn't help the situation.....he is so used to their really didn't phase him that much....however.....the next event really was what seemed to sink the entire day to it's lowest depths.

This morning at our house was crazy and Z was very focused on his audition today so apparently.....while he was getting ready for school.....some things slipped through the putting on a belt. Z has taken a growth spurt of late and in that spurt he started losing weight. None of the pants that fit when school now. So as he was walking through the commons during passing period............yeah you guessed......his pants dropped. Now don't get me wrong....Z is not above dropping his pants in the commons for a laugh, but that is in HIS time. It doesn't feel quite the same when you have already had the day from hell and it is only 9:30 a.m. and you had no plans of showing your boxers that day. Thank God they were clean! There were laughs....lots of laughs but Z felt instead of laughing with him....they were laughing at him. Truth be told, the kids probably thought it was a joke and secondly the same kids that would have laughed had it been a joke were laughing even though it was a totally unplanned skivvy show. Needless to say....that final phone call was frustration and resignation all at the same time. I couldn't help but snicker momentarily at the mental picture.....he on the other hand neither appreciated my snicker nor did he find any humor in the current situation. I told him to laugh it off. He really didn't appear to be in a laughing mood though. I understood. I told him things would get better and to just hold his head up and get to his next class. Not sure if that was what he was looking for.....but he sounded okay when he got off the phone. (Hope the office ladies didn't see him....Grrr)

So why the blog about such a horrible day? Well....because as a parent this was hard on me too. No...I am not making this about me, I am saying that no parent wants to see their kid have such a rotten day. No parent wants to get that call from their kid hearing the underlying "please make it all better," and know there is absolutely nothing they can do to change things. And no parent is without having a few sucky days of their own to pull they can both sympathize and empathize with this kind of day. I know that Z left the house with such hope this morning only to feel like the day beat him up and left him bruised and battered...and all before mid morning even hit. I heard the disappointment in his voice and I could hear the frustration as his day continued to sink further and further into the abyss of high school hell. And yes...I wanted to make it all better......but the fact is....this is life and some days are just gonna suck! Some days are gonna be full of failed auditions, nasty office ladies and pants falling down in a crowd. But it is those days that give us a true life education, teach us humility and make us not take ourselves too seriously. Nothing happened today that is going to change the world, cause irreparable damage or even probably be remembered come Monday. However Z learned some very valuable lessons today. He learned that no matter how talented you are or think you are.....not every audition is going to be your best work or get you a part. If you are a strong person, believe in yourself and your is those "fails" that make you re-evaluate your performance, make you work harder and make you give your very best every time. If you don't know failure....then you can never appreciate success. He also learned he needs to pay attention and read signs and that some people are just never going to like you or be nice to you. You can let them define you and how you feel about yourself....or you can realize that in most cases......the problem is not you at all....but some issue that they them self have. Finally he learned that everyone loses their pants, wears two different shoes, has a boob pop out or farts loudly at some inopportune time in life. It happens to all of us. It almost seems to be a cosmic joke that keeps us humble and gives God and the angels a chuckle. How we react to these little faux pas is a character building exercise which teaches us to cope with life and all the little unexpected things that tend to happen. Fun? No! But then again the really tough lessons seldom are.

So I hope and yes even said a couple of prayers.....that Z's day improves. Knowing Z's mother....and I do know her well, we will be looking for the humor in all of this as soon as possible. Yeah....some days just suck! What else can I say?


Anonymous said...

Are you really back or just teasing us? I haven't had a good cup of coffee in days because I haven't had your blog to read with it. Sorry about Z's bad day. I really like the way you think about it all though and the way you are making Z look at it. I have no doubt you are raising an extra ordinary young man. He obviously has an extra ordinary mom. Great blog. Now come back regularly!

Anonymous said...

Tough days and learning how to "deal" with it are part of going up.

Z is a great kid and I have no doubt that he is going to go on to do great things in his life. But first, you gotta survive high school and denting up mom's minivan. Opps. Did I say that?

That aside, I came to small town KS after living most of my childhood in Europe. I went from Madrid to what I thought was nowhere during sophomore mid-year. Culture SHOCK!

But I quickly adapted and learned to love our common hometown. And the lessons I learned there I have carried with me since and they have taken me far.

Z will do the same if not better. So tell him I said to suck it UP!

My best to the family!

Steve J.

Calvin and Hobbs said...

The school of hard knocks is a tough one to attend. Add in the embarrassment of mishaps and high school mentalities and you end up with a really bad day. It sounds like Z has some great home support and a good sense of humor. By Monday this will all be water under the bridge. Nice blog.