Today...even though the story is about me.....it was a no brainer, for on this day eleven years ago, I was blessed with an amazing miracle. I was blessed with David. He came into this world fighting and for the better part of five months....he lay between life and death. I had never known that someone could be beyond critical, but that was the state of David's life for what seemed like forever. I have told the story of David many times and if you would like to read it....here it is. Today though, I am going to share with you what David did for me.
Before David was born we were a typical family. We all had separate lives that every once in awhile intersected, but that is how we survived. I took care of the kids, Tim worked and the kids had their lives which whenever possible....did not include the entire family. When I found out I was pregnant, we were all overjoyed as I had months earlier suffered a very early miscarriage that had left me reeling. We were really hoping for a girl this time but when we found out it was to be another boy.....I was secretly relieved, as I had already raised or help raise several boys....so I kinda knew what I was doing. A girl I think might just have terrified my very existence.
This pregnancy was different than the rest. This one wiped me out. My bed and I spent a great deal of quality time together as I would work around the house for half an hour and lay down for an hour. My body felt done in. The upside was my then four year old Z and I got to spend a lot of time together. When Mama laid down, Z was right next to her. I never watched so much Sesame Street and Barnie in my life. The blessing was....it is still a time that both Z and I remember fondly as "our" time.
I was an average mom at the time. I was busy working two jobs and helping Tim cater. I managed to give the kids what they needed, but going above and beyond didn't happen much as there simply wasn't time. I took a lot for granted: kids crawling, walking, running, and eventually being independent. Life went by in such a blurr there was seldom time for me to think about blessings or be very grateful for what I had. I was just trying to get through the days and not fall on my face from exhaustion. Little did I know that my life would soon turn inside out and never.....ever.....be the same again.
When David arrived.....his life and mine were in grave danger, which explained the doctors and nurses standing around laughing and joking with me one minute and frantically getting me ready for surgery the next. Suddenly Tim and Z were being shoved out of my ER room and I was face to face with the head of the neonatal unit and her telling me that "if" my child survived he would be in her care. Twenty-seven weeks was so early and his chances were at the time....about 30%. Little did I know....nor am I sure would I have cared at that moment....but my own chances weren't very good either as I was bleeding internally and my hematacrit was 5 and going down. Poor Tim must have been terrified knowing that he could lose both his wife and son in a matter of minutes. It was something he never would talk about.
After David was born, it seemed like we were living in hell. After being given blood....I was up the next day walking back and forth to the NICU whenever they would let me. This was the first time I had heard the term beyond critical and I was afraid to leave his side. I was in love, terrified, and determined.....all at the same time. I was constantly cautioned that I was overdoing but I didn't care. If I was going to lose him....which I refused to do....I was going to be by his side. For those of you who do not believe in God, the power of prayer or faith.....I challenge you to go through a situation such as this and hold onto those non-beliefs. Because that time, in all of it's hell.....was wrapped in more blessings and miracles than anyone can imagine. It was such a unbelievable time that the neonatoligist a woman of pure science, who made no bones about her atheistic beliefs....told us the day that we walked out of the hospital with him....that David was a bona fide miracle. Her exact words were....."too much went on with this case that was unexplainable and never should have happened. It is obviously that some Higher Power had a hand in your sons life." It was a WOW moment.
In those months waiting for him to turn a corner, waiting for him to breathe on his own, waiting to hear his little voice.....I found my family again. We stopped going in different directions as we were all now headed in one. We were all there for David. We all remembered that God gave us the greatest gift of all.....prayer and we used it to the fullest extent. I learned that my faith waned with exhaustion and fear, but Tim's burned with a fire I didn't know existed. He told me...."you have had all the faith in this relationship so far.....now it is time for me to have the faith for both of us." I saw a father that grew from this experience. No matter how tired he was after he worked his second shift job, he would head to the hospital and spend time with his child. And before he headed to work the next day....he was there again. The love and respect I gained for this man during this time was beyond belief.
My children were also amazing during this time. None felt slighted or jealous that mom and dad had to spend time at the hospital. Man Child stepped up to the plate and watched Z, kept the house clean and spent time at the hospital with me whenever he could. Z would always welcome me home with a hug and kiss and ask me how Baby David was doing. They were so good and I was so blessed.
During those months...... I was shaken to my vary core. I spent so much time on the NICU roller coaster ride. Things could change so quickly from bad to good and good to bad, we never knew what each day would hold. I learned to pray like I never prayed before. I learned that there are somethings in life that you simply have no control over. I learned that I did not pick out my husband....that God had picked him out and that God knew I would need him and no other man during this time in my life. I learned that faith is something that is not optional when you go through something like this, and I learned that God had blessed me with everyone and everything I needed to survive this time in my life.
The first five months of David's life set the stage for everything in his life to come. The fact that he survived the worst has made everything else.....acheiveable. Watching David grow I have learned to appreciate the things in life that I had always taken for granted. The normal milestones have become major accomplishments and I now see life through very different eyes. Davids birth was the beginning of many changes in my life. But David's life brought a strength to my life that I might not have had without him. I can honestly say that David changed my life in so many ways and brought me so many blessings that I never dreamed possible.
So today.....eleven years later.....I would like to wish my little man David, a very happy birthday. Thank you my wonderful son for all that you have brought to my life and all that you continue to bring. The doctor was right....you truly are a bona fide miracle and your mama loves you more than life itself!