Saturday, September 3, 2011

Hell Week

Finally.....we come to the end of one of the more trying weeks of my year. This one has been a real hoot....if by hoot you mean just about every second of every minute sucked! And like my dislikes this week.....I have found much more than just one thing to rant about. So since I am at the end of what will forever be fondly known as hell week, I have decided to about it all.

Where to begin? I am thinking that things look/seem so much worse than perhaps they are because we are on day 1000 of being 100 degrees or higher here in our little state. Okay....maybe I exaggerated a bit, but it doesn't feel like much. The truth is....yesterday marked the 52nd day this spring/summer where temps were 100 degrees or more. I can't speak for anyone else....but I am tired of sweating. All summer even with deodorant and perfume......I have smelled like floral sweat and trust me...that is not a pretty smell. Today I just paid another almost $500 electric bill and because of our huge water lawn looks like a dried up straw field. Okay....truthfully, I probably wouldn't have watered much anyway.....but the restrictions just piss me off. You can tell that everyone is affected by the extreme heat because everyone is just as nasty as I am. People are grumpy, they have no patience and their road rage is insane. Okay....maybe that last one is just me and quite possibly the weather has nothing to do with it....but the bottom line is....I am so ready for fall.

And now onto a subject that I have touched on a few times already....but it still ticks me off to the point of making me want  to punch a pillow. Yeah....that's just how I roll! You know....I am not ancient (no snickers please) but I have been around a minute or two and in my advanced years....I have learned a few things. I have had experience with relationships (young ones....not old ones), loss, business and people in general. I have some life experience under my belt and contrary to popular belief.....I am NOT stupid. That being said.....I try very hard to keep my wisdom to I see an avoidable bad situation approaching or two I am asked. When one of those two occurs, then all bets are off on my ability to stay silent. For the most part I have tried very hard to keep quiet even when I see the avoidable about to happen, mostly because sometimes people just have to learn on their own and me piping up is really not going to change things and in the end usually just ticks people off. I get that! However.....don't ask me for advice and then get angry when I give it to you. Don't ask me for advice and then act like I am stupid for giving it to you. And finally....don't ask me for advice....not take it....and then get angry because things fall apart. I have been dealing with this a lot this week and I have about had it. I have said and done all I can for those that ask for help but refuse to listen. I have since decided that those asking actually like the negativity and bad situations, so believe it or not....I am shutting up. You can lead the stupid to the facts....but you can't make them listen, believe or I simply quit! But darn it....don't come crying to me when the bottom falls out of your world, because I might just have to say....I TOLD YOU SO! And yes again....I am THAT kind of a person!

Finally....I am angry beyond words. You all know that I talk about my youngest son David. He is special needs and he needs different therapies. He needs occupational therapy (OT), speech therapy and most of all physical therapy (PT). He has needed them since he was very little and when you are the parent of a special needs kind of learn as you go. Well to make a long story short, David had received all his therapies through the school and had done very well until his PT had to leave the school district. His PT had been wonderful with David and he was stretched regularly, made to walk with his walker everywhere he went and she was getting wonderful progress from him. I nearly cried when she left, but I was open minded and hoped that his new PT would be just as good. Right off the bat I saw a difference. His old PT was in contact with me at least once a week letting me know how David was progressing and what I needed to be doing at home. There was none of this from the new one. Then I had a para tell me confidentially that he was no longer being stretched because she didn't believe in it. Instead they put him in a stander 20 minutes a day and called it good. I called the PT and asked what was up and she let me know that she had over 20 years experience with special needs kids and that her way was successful. Again...I was learning as I went so I tried to keep an open mind. Then I started seeing him go down hill. His muscles were tightening and his mobility was getting bad. He had had some seizure issues but the neurologist said get him back to his normal schedule as soon as possible. Instead the PT insisted that he no longer walk with is walker and that he be in his wheelchair at all times. I had no idea this was going on until after the fact. When I took him to the orthopedist, he had a fit. He said to get David away from that PT and to put him into outside PT. This meant twice a week pulling him out of school and taking him to Wichita to have PT. Needless to say the PT at school was indignant but since the doctor over rode her, there was little she could do. Her role now was to over see stretches at school which the ortho insisted upon and that was it. This worked for about a year and then last year David started having major melt downs at his outside PT. The PT and I were flabbergasted. He acted scared and would come out fighting when she would come near him to stretch him. She felt horrible and I had no idea what was going on. When I took him to school I told the para he had at the time and she said....I think I know what it is. She then told me that his at school PT was getting in his face, screaming at him and had even grabbed his face. She said David was terrified of her and he would start screaming every time she came near him. I was stunned. This information was then backed up by a teacher who had also witnessed it. I went through the roof. I told the school that the PT was not to touch him again....and because of his behavior at the outside PT.....he could no longer go back there. I was angry beyond belief. I got Davids advocate involved and the state said a new PT had to be put in place immediately. When I went to the meeting....the old PT did not attend and I was told by administrative staff the she had resigned. I didn't care as long as she never came near my son again.

God was watching over David because the school was fortunate enough to find a wonderful PT and she began work with David immediately. Within just a few weeks his mobility was progressing and the new PT even fit him with and made him new braces. Apparently the ones the old PT had made were ill fitting and were generic and not made for his particular issues at all. Again I was furious and thankful all at the same time. David continued to progress and the new PT was getting things out of David no one else had been able to. He ended up having a wonderful school year.

When summer came and we went into the extended school year, the school decided not to have the actual PT work with David but had a para who had learned all of Davids necessary PT from the PT do his daily workouts. I was fine with that because she knew what she was doing. Then just before school started, I was told his PT wouldn't be back. That is also when I learned that his old PT was still in the school. She had only resigned from David, but she was still working with other special needs kids. I was not happy, but my first issue was making sure David had PT. School has been in session three weeks and no PT. At first the school even refused to let the para's stretch David as no PT was overseeing him....but that did not fly and so the para's were allowed to stretch him. Then I happened to talk to a social worker friend of mine who asked about David. I told her his current situation and she told me that if the school had not provided a good PT for him by Sept. 1st that I should contact the state. Trying to be fair....I contacted the special needs administration at the school and asked first how progress was coming on finding a PT. I was told that they had been unsuccessful as of yet, but that they were looking. I then let them know that I was very unhappy that the old PT was still there but that the new one was let go. Excuses were made and then I was told that I was the only one that had ever complained about the old one. I went through the roof. I was the only one who complained because I was the only one who knew how she acted around the kids. Had a para and teacher not told me....I would not have known. I let her know that I was sure that if other parents of special needs kids were aware of what was going on......there would be complaints. I was met with more excuses and I was livid. I also let her know that I was not letting this drop and that if the old PT had done this to David.....she surely has done it to others. And even if it only happened to one child....that was one child too many. Especially when you are dealing with children who often times have no voice and aren't capable of defending themselves. How dare this school school system put my child or any other child in the hands of such a person who calls herself a professional. I am taking this to the parents, the superintendent, the school board and the state. This is wrong and how can this school justify such an injustice to these children? In case your wondering....when I am through....heads are gonna roll!

Add to all of this....the possibly that Z has mono again (we are suppose to get the test results Tuesday), money is short, days are long and I am exhausted......and maybe you will understand why this week has been nothing but one big RANT! Of course....things could always be worse, but when your really don't want to hear that. You just want to rant!

Here's hoping that next week is so much better and that you all have a very wonderful and rant free Saturday!


Marni said...

Girl, all I'm gonna say is "You're My Hero!!!" you have the strength of so many that I am still just finding in myself. Yes you have crap going on that any normal person would throw their hands up and just say "I give up!" I'm sure at a moment that might have gone through your mind but it doesn't stay there for long. I can only hope that when I'm your age I have the same strength that you have. (ok THAT part was to make you laugh....hehehehe).
You stand your ground when others Would walk away. If I ever need someone to stand with me for something, believe me I'm going to call you!!
Some (and we know who I'm talking about) will see this blog as whining, bullying and just "you're a horrible person" I say whatever. Your blogs are about real life and somehow you make it funny or you bring out in us the little flame in ourselves that makes us say "NO I'm not taking that anymore!!!
I pray that your next week is one that gives you some breathing room, some cooler weather and of course some kick ass attitude toward that PT and whoever is backing her.

Anonymous said...

Cmom, you know that I don't agree with much that you do and I think you spend your life meddling and driving people crazy BUT taking a stand for child with special needs is neither of those things. Kudos for standing up for those who cannot stand up for themselves. I hope you take every bit of your bitchiness and tenacity and take down that PT and anyone who allowed her to stay on at your school.

Marni said...

Oh Anonymous....I KNEW that you couldnt be as heartless as you have come across!!! And I know that Cmom will totally appreciate what you posted!!!

Norm said...

@ PT: Thank God a couple honest folks with integrity stepped up and let you know what is going on. Hope you get that sorted out in a hurry.

@ dispensing wisdom. Most folks aren't both able and willing to heed advice. We hope our kids will but that's a toss up. I suspect most folks with wisdom will have to resign to the fact that people we care about are going to crash and burn instead of taking a little advice.

Sorry you had a tough week.

Jill said...

Mulvane USD sure has a lot of issues that, it seems to me, are not being dealth with correctly...or even at all. You know my story about how my daughter has been relentlessly bullied and now attends another school because a teacher/coach in the district told a relative of ours that "she wasn't going to make it in Mulvane High". Well, my nephew (who is new to the district this year), was stabbed, along with another student, by a little girl who thought it would be funny while being transported from the grade school to the middle school on the bus, with an insulin needle. They are not taking responsibility for that either. To all this, I have to say, WTF are you doing Mulvane USD administrators...nothing? Just collecting a paycheck, as usual.