What is the update? That is the question I have been asked a million times in the last week and the truth is, there have been no definites and still aren't any, but here is the current status of our life.
We have had snow and ice most of the week and school has been called off three days in a row. We have cabin fever and my usually dazzling personality is absolutely dimming. The upside to this is, I have a really great lawyer. This man is kind and takes a lot of time and attention to detail. He listens to me and lets me ask questions and that in and of itself is amazing. Still, though...this is a tough situation and me not being privy to all the why's and wherefores that are behind this whole decision to evict us and sell my home, makes for a less than cut and dried case. Add to that, the opposing attorney is not exactly being forthright (as is her right) and the legalities are tough, but then again, most worthwhile things in life are tough and I am no stranger to this.
I will say that I have had some surprising and totally unexpected avenues appear on the horizon and there is great hope that my goal of saving David's house will be met. Prayer and faith are amazing things and I am grateful that my mother instilled great faith in me and that my family, friends and complete strangers have bestowed many many prayers on this situation and I do believe that mountains may be moving.
We currently have approximately $16,000 in donations alone which is unbelievable in such a short time. The donations have come from all over but the majority have originated right here in our community, which is amazing. My community is not one of great financial wealth, but it is one of great kindness, generosity, faith and love. This is beyond evident when you see all that have jumped in to help us and make sure that David's home remains his.
On top of the donations, a Save David's Home fundraiser has been planned for March 10th. It will be a chili cinnamon roll feed(it's a Mulvane thing) until 3:30 p.m. and from 5:30 on it will be hot dogs and a cheesecake bar. Throughout the day there will be a silent auction and bake sale. The items that are being donated for the auction are amazing as are the donations for supplies to make the food. It is simply overwhelming to see so much love for David.
Another fundraiser is being planned for April 7th at a local restaurant. It will be a bierock casserole dinner. We are also working on a quartermania as well as a few other things that are still being talked about. It is a huge amount of money being sought after by a town full of huge hearts.
Now back to the situation. My lawyer was hoping that in light of the many different and extenuating circumstances, that we might get until the end of May to do our fundraisers and get the money raised, without having to get the court involved. It would definitely take some of the extreme pressure and stress off of me with David's upcoming surgery.
People may not realize this, but along with helping to plan and implement all of the fundraising stuff, I still have a house to take care of (yes....David's house), laundry to do, David to take care of, David's appointments to go to and other things pertaining to David as he is turning 18 this year and I have a great deal of paperwork and legal work that has to be done there too, so yeah....a little bit of an extension would have gone a long way to keeping my blood pressure from going sky high and my brain from exploding. No such luck. In fact, his request was met with an emphatic NO! and the counter offer was that we could have until March 31st (David will likely still be in the hospital at that time) and in order to get that much time, I had to get a letter from a financial institution saying that I could get the money and get a letter from David's doctor saying that he in fact was having surgery in March. Can you believe that? I have to prove that David is having surgery, as if I would lie about that....or anything for that matter. It was so disheartening but at least it gave us an actual 30 day extension. Thank you God.
Yesterday I had to write a letter that was extremely hard as a first step to negotiating more time. The letter was to let them(the opposing side) know that I was not trying to be difficult and that I was trying to put the best interest of everyone in the forefront. I was told to include details of David's surgery, why the house was originally promised to us and how I felt about receiving the eviction papers that day. It was so hard because as I wrote it, I had to go back to David's birth, his diagnosis's, Tim dying, Mom dying and my dad feeling that my kids had been through so much and he wanted to offer them/us a place of comfort after all the turmoil and sadness. I had to remember telling him how much I appreciated his offer of us moving in to this home, but I couldn't do it if we would just have to move again. The kids had just been through too much. Then there was the unexpected kindness from him, telling me that this would be our home as long as we wanted it. It would be our forever home.
Then I had to go over David's health and his upcoming surgery along with his previous surgeries. I had to give details about David that since they are family, they should already know and have some understanding and compassion for. But then I realized that the whole reason we are going through this is because they simply do not.
Finally I had to understand as I wrote this letter, that I might as well have been pleading my case...our case to complete strangers, because the reality is, they don't know me at all. They don't know what I do or how I have fought all of these years to raise my kids, take care of David and respect this home all on my own. They don't know the tears of frustration I have shed at times realizing that I was doing this by myself....something I never signed on for. They don't know the nights I didn't sleep or sat in ER's and hospital rooms again, by myself. They don't know the times I have sat next to David while he was sick or septic and wondered if those were our last moments together. No, they don't know me. And what's worse is, they don't know David. They have never bothered to know David because he was loud, or he didn't communicate well or that he wasn't their vision of normal. They never got to know him and his love of Spongebob and Cops. They never watched his excitement as he walked with his walker and greeted people in his path. And they never got to hear his amazing belly laugh when something was funny to him, causing everyone else in the room to laugh too. Because if they had, if they cared, then this would never be happening.
If they knew us, then we would mean something to them and if we meant something to them, then consideration would have been given to our situation. I would have been part of the decision making process. I would have had a voice in all of it and most importantly.....David would have mattered. So yes, the letter was very hard for me. Much harder than I ever imagined something could be. Realizing the truth is sometimes a difficult thing.
Today, I begin again and continue to fight. There are positive things in the wings that along with the fundraisers and donations, are quietly coming to fruition. There is much hope and I know in my heart that we will not lose our home and that in the process, I am learning many valuable lessons about life, people and appreciation. I am at peace and I am grateful.
So that my friends is the situation.
#savedavidshome
#fightfordavid
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