So we survived the Harry Potter midnight movie. Z was home by 3ish and today I am toast. I am sure he will be too. I discovered last night whilst laying awake waiting for him that after midnight....there is nothing worth watching on TV. Not even on the 5 billion cable channels I have. Unless you are in the market for a Magic Bullet, a George Foreman Grill or want to learn how to get in shape with P90X (perhaps I should have watched this one), then you are pretty much out of options. I have seen every episode of The Nanny and That 70's Show and short of staring at local radar (which by the way was blank), TV viewing was a bust. This then forced me to be alone with my thoughts. Lisa and undivided attention to her thoughts are never a good idea.....even when she is not exhausted.
I started wondering just what kind of mother I really am. You can scarcely turn on the news anymore without hearing about a horrid accident that some teenager was in, or hearing about a teenage abduction, suicide or murder. It makes you wonder.....where were their mothers? Was there mom at home waiting for them to return from a midnight movie fighting sleep deprivation and making them text their every move or was their mom asleep...assuming all was perfectly fine....until she got the call/knock on her door/found the body? I know it sounds awful.....but this is very real in our world. I wrestle constantly with how much leeway is too much leeway? I want to know who Z is with, where he is at and when I can expect him home? Curfews are mandatory in my house and if they are broken.....there better be an excuse that is better than "oops....I lost track of the time!" I have no unrealistic ideals that Z will never get into trouble, after all....I have already seen his work. I know all about peer pressure, drugs, alcohol and those kids that appear "cool" but have jail sentence written all over their forehead. I already raised one of those and I want Z to steer as far clear of all of that as possible. I also know that sometimes pushing too hard one direction can cause them to automatically head in another. This tight rope of motherhood just to get a kid safely raised and out the door can really suck! That and I always thought I would be the "cool" mom. Little did I know that ship would sail the minute my idea of what was safe for them and their idea of what was safe for them started differing. I haven't been cool for years.
So we have jumped ahead a bit and Z seems to be rolling with the punches and doing fine on just a couple hours of sleep. I on the other hand have dozed in my coffee several times already, there is drool on my desk and I have been asked to keep my snoring to manageable levels. Apparently the customers were complaining. Oh the joys of being young and being able to go for days on just a few hours sleep. I miss those days....sort of. Okay....I miss the energy of those days, not so much the antics. Back then my energy level was huge and I was like the Energizer Bunny. Now a days....my energy level is non-existent and although still like EB....I am just like him....without the batteries. Thank goodness this is Friday. Although this weekend will be non-stop "fun", I do hope to at least throw in a couple of hours of uninterrupted, unstressed sleep. It should be pure bliss!
Since I am starting to mumble and misspell and mistype, I guess now is as good a time as any to move onto the 30 Day Song Challenge. Day 15: A song that describes you. Since I couldn't find any songs about sleep deprivation...I had to go with choice number 2. I have always loved this song....mostly because the words remind me of me. I guess today's was really a no brainer and those of you who know me well....I am sure will agree. Here is Matchbox Twenty and Unwell.