So I am just not feeling today. I think I want to crawl back into bed and go back to sleep. You see....in last nights/this mornings dreams....life was a bit easier than the real thing. I want my dream world back, or at the very least, this particular dream to become a reality. Sigh.....probably not going to happen. Last night was not particularly a fun night. David has gotten into a bad habit of taking a nap in the evening and then wanting to be awake half the night. Every time I would shut an eye he would be hitting me or poking me or playing with my eyes. It was not a very restful night and I am not in a great mood.
Yes....Z is not happy with his mother. Luckily he has lived with me and my procrastinative ways long enough to know how I work and not to be surprised when things don't get immediately done. They usually always get done.....just never in a timely manner. After a thorough search...there was no birth certificate to be found in my house. He is probably now wondering if he is even mine and if there is someway he can leave me and go find his "real" family. Perhaps with a mother who doesn't procrastinate! Needless to say there will be no drivers license today. This will throw him off his driving schedule and makes him less than pleased, but lucky for me.....he seems to be over it. HUGE note to self: As soon as I get paid....need to order Z's bc! We'll see if it happens!
I am feeling extremely unsettled again. Right now though....I have no real reason. Perhaps it is just a knee-jerk reaction to my past that is affecting my present. I really shouldn't praise my current situation too much as history has taught me over and over again that with just a few simple words.....I can jinx myself for weeks to come. We will leave this as....things could be worse so I need to just quit stressing/feeling unsettled and be grateful for what I have.
It is after noon now. I am on the down hill slide of my work day and all I can think about is a nap. Perhaps I will go home and take a nap this afternoon and then when David tries to sleep tonight.....I will poke him, hit him and play with his eyes. Yeah! That was the immature child in me speaking. Chances are I am going home and heading straight for the pool. Then perhaps get some housework done. Maybe? Maybe not! Guess we will just have to wait and see.
So we are up to day 20 on the 30 Day Challenge. Today's song is: A song that you listen to when you’re angry. As ticky as I seem to be all the time, you would think that there would be a song for that. Actually though, I really don't have an anger song. Not anymore anyway. When I was in high school/college and I would get upset or frustrated.....I did have "go to" band and song. I remember spending many teen angsting hours on my bed with the record player cranked (yes...again I said record player), listening to this particular song. Even today....on certain occasions when frustration seems to be my only friend (you like the self pity in those words?) I will still turn up the volume on Boston and listen to More Than a Feeling!
So go out and enjoy the rest of this afternoon. Here is hoping you have a fantastically happy hump day. Happy Wednesday!